- Why Is She Ignoring Me? 7 Reasons Why.
- Why Does She Ignore Me: 7 Reasons Why
- Why is she ignoring me if she likes me
- How To Handle a Girl Who’s Not Responding to Texts–Here’s How to Get Her to Text You Back FAST (And Then Some)…
- How To Get a Girl to Text Back, Every Time
- Don’t Make “She Didn’t Text Back” The Norm: Tips For Always Getting a Text Back
- It Was Your Interaction With Her That Sucked!
- It’s Still Good to Know How to Text a Girl…
- How To Always Make It a “Sure Thing”
- Why Do Girls “Ghost”? Here’s What Ghostbusters Didn’t Tell You…
- 3 Questions to Determine Why She’s REALLY Ignoring Your Texts
- 3 Texts to Send a Girl Who’s “Ghosting” You (And How To Get a Girl To Text Back)…
- One Foolproof “Break Glass in Case of Emergency” Step to Make Her Respond…
- 5 “Copy & Paste” Texts That Get Her to Drop Everything & Come Over Right Away…
- How Can I Get an Old Crush to Message Me Back?
- The Cold Hard Truth About Girls From Your Past Who Don’t Message Back…
- Do Women Like to Be Ignored?
- Where Guys Go Wrong
- Ignoring Her Isn’t Always the Answer
- Ignoring an Ex
- Guys Ignoring Girls in Hollywood Movies
- Be the Confident, Forward Moving Guy That Women Are Hoping to Meet
- Traits and Behaviors That Turn a Woman Off
- Start Paying Attention to Women in the Right Way
- You are about to discover my personal secret for success with women. This FREE, 21-minute video will BLOW YOUR MIND (I promise!)
- The Head Pro
- Here’s What Nice Guys Need To Do To Actually Get The Girl For Once
Why Is She Ignoring Me? 7 Reasons Why.
Why is she ignoring me!!?? I know this process can be frustrating and leave you confused since your yearning for your loved one’s affection or attention. In this article, I am going to discuss the reasons why you are being ignored and what to do from here. It’s important to understand to not look past the things that got you to this point. Either you didn’t court her properly, you did something to ruin her trust, or she may not be interested. I will define all this as you read along.
One of the things that I often see men doing is not taking ownership to the reason why you may be getting ignored especially if you did something wrong in the relationship. But you taking ownership now by reading this article is the first step, so congratulations on becoming a better man! In this article, I am going to explain to you exactly what to do from here moving forward. After reading this article you’ll be less confused and you will know how to handle this moving forward.
How about if you didn’t do anything wrong and you feel like you’re being ghosted, or maybe she said: “I need space.” Well, this is where you’ll find all the advice you need!
I love hearing from you, share your feedback or questions in the comments below.
Why Does She Ignore Me: 7 Reasons Why
She’s Bored- Typically a woman gets bored with you because there isn’t something new. You might be doing something with her that’s just routine and not enhancing the relationship. The thrill in the relationship might be lost. Here is where you should do something enticing and different. In relationships, you should challenge each other to step out of your comfort zones in healthy ways. So, if this rings to you and you feel like you’re getting ignored because dating you was too routine then try changing it up like go rock climbing, laser tag, vacation, beach, there are so many ideas. Look for ways that you can do things differently in a relationship.
Pushing an Issue- A lot of times I see men pushing issues on a woman about possibly spending time together or not getting enough time. Maybe she has kids, and you want to spend more time with her, you continue to push her on spending quality time together, and she ends up begin resentful or aggravated with you. This is the most common one I see all the time. There are a lot of other issues that you can continue to push on her, and it just ends up driving her away. Whenever I see couple’s pushing their problems on each other, I ask. Why are you forcing this issue? Is it for self-fish reasons, expectations or is it because you want to be in control? The relationship gets often destroyed because of this.
You’re Too Shy- You’re probably thinking what? I got to this point so why would she think I’m too shy. Women love a man that steps up to the plate and pursues her. So, if you’re going with the flow, she may think that you’re not serious about a relationship or her. Woman love when a man courts them to take her out and do things together!
You’re Inconsistent- If you’re not showing up for a woman by sticking to your words and following through then she might not be taking you seriously. So, if your dating a woman of high-value and she sees that your inconsistent she’s not going to wait around for you. Some examples of being inconsistent are not planning and doing everything last minute, not sticking to your word, sending a text every once in a while, to check in. What people call breadcrumbing. You sprinkle a little bit of attention to hope she sticks around.
Life- As general as that sounds life can get in the way! There is divine timing for everything and everyone. If you try to force your way through this, you will get hurt! Here is what I mean by this. Maybe she is working and trying to advance in her career or school and doesn’t have time for a relationship or the attention you deserve or want. Or possibly she isn’t ready to settle down at this very moment, and you can’t change someone’s mind about this. They will have to change their minds not you. If this woman wants to have fun, then my advice is to walk away.
She Might Have a New Boyfriend- Let’s face it, this happens more than ever now because people date several people at once. But it’s important to understand that it’s possible she was dating someone before she met you and advanced further into the relationship then she did with you.
She Might Not Feel the Spark- You may not have built an emotional connection with her, or maybe it just wasn’t there. A lot of men take pride in getting a woman to like them so they easily ignore signals of when a woman isn’t into them since they don’t want to pay attention to the signals. We all face rejection in our life, and it doesn’t make you any better or worse. So, if there is no spark there, I suggest you move on!
Why is she ignoring me if she likes me
Here’s the truth on what I see happening in almost 90% of my coaching sessions. A lot, of times the woman you like or you’re in love with is ignoring you because you became overbearing or may have influenced a lot of the arguments because of you possibly being co-dependent on her. Now, one thing that’s very important here is that you understand this is something that can drive a relationship downhill. Why? Everyone wants to have their personal space, and time for themselves. We tend to forget that we are all individuals and even though you are in a relationship or dating this person they still need their time to let things progress etc. I say this because everyone processes things differently. Possibly your someone who wants to talk things out right away but she might need her time. As people, we tend to believe that certain people, places, or professional aspirations are above us; better than us. You may feel they may be cooler, smarter or just generally more valuable than you are. So, instead of investing your time into yourself you invest it into them. You cater to their needs and forget our own- and this, to put it simply, is not fair. You are important, you are valuable, you are relevant. Our dreams are not above us, but rather, they are ahead of us. Use this moment right now as an opportunity to put yourself on the pedestal. Take control and don’t instill more worry or doubt because by doing this they know you will be there every single minute, hour, or day and end up taking you for granted. There is a difference between healthy dependencies and unhealthy dependencies which I talk about in another article so if this interest you, please feel free to click here to read this article about co-dependencies.
The best thing to do right now is giving her space. Don’t text, don’t call, don’t knock at her door. Don’t base your actions on emotions do them with logic by taking your time. When you take time for yourself, it’s essential that you redefine what makes you happy. To have a healthy relationship, it’s essential for your health as well. So, what can you do to enhance the relationship with yourself and focus on your qualities to attract the person or the right ones into your life? Having self-respect is continuing to do the things that make you happy, showing up for you, and setting boundaries on what is right for you and the relationship. Don’t act on emotions instead take the time that it takes to recover your emotions and come from logic.
Now, let’s chat briefly about if you were dating this girl and eventually you both just lost touch or possibly she never returned your calls. Well, most of the time when this happens she isn’t that into you. I know sometimes that’s hard to swallow as that takes a big hit to your ego but don’t let this get the best of you because once you find the one these things won’t matter.
I welcome your comments below. If you have any questions about a specific situation, please feel free to reach out.
Wishing you the best.
Apollonia Ponti, an international certified coach and founder of apolloniaponti.com. She works with men to attract the woman they desire, build confidence, master their attraction skills and helps rebuild relationships.
You can find her expert advice on “is she using me”, plus a couple other of your core professional services, through her YouTube Channel, and Attract a Woman E-Book. To get real results with women NOW! Change your life and master your attraction. Book a coaching session here.
When women were labeled the “fairer sex,” it wasn’t in reference to their behavior. Women are anything but “fair.” They are, however, masters in the art of manipulation — but all with good reason.
Women often feel powerless in relationships since men tend to shy away from any request involving the word “talk,” which, in turn, leaves a host of unresolved issues and no outlet for dealing with them. Enter Plan B: passive aggression.
The following are tricks — or “power plays” — she uses to assert dominance, to remind you of her importance and to let you know she’s not to be taken for granted. These temper tantrums can be acted out by any female, of any age, at any time.
Read on to learn about her power plays — and how to nip this behavior in the bud.
1. Dressing Sexy
If an otherwise conservative woman is suddenly dressing in red fishnets for a night out with the girls, she’s trying to tell you something. Women don’t turn into harlots overnight, and if she does, this is a good indication that she feels like you’re not giving her enough attention. Dressing like a tart is one of her power plays because it will have other men lusting after her, which is probably what she wishes you were doing. This power play is happening because she’s feeling neglected and ignored, whether the emotions are warranted or not. This behavior is also intended to make you consider the possibility of someone else moving in and stealing your woman.
Stopping this power play: You have two options in dealing with her power play: intervene or ignore. Some women get really turned on by a man who steps in and puts his foot down. If this sounds like your girlfriend, go ahead and intervene by letting her know she’s not going out dressed like that. If, however, you’re dating a modern female (and most of you are), this is strongly discouraged, unless you want to see World War III from the front lines. Your best move is ignoring the tantrum altogether. Act normal, smile and tell her to have fun and enjoy herself. Steal her thunder, and that’ll be the last time she plays dress-up.
2. Witholding Sex/Affection
One of the oldest power plays in the book, this one doesn’t usually start out with the intention of withholding sex or affection out of revenge. Rather, it starts out as pure hurt. Sometimes it manifests as anger, but rest assured that hurt is always the foundation. Unfortunately, a woman tends to assume her man is fully aware of her pain — she also assumes he knows precisely how he caused it, which means he should also know how to fix it. In reality, the poor guy doesn’t have a clue; he just knows she’s pissed off at him. He also knows that every time he tries to kiss or hold her, she responds frigidly.
Stopping this power play: This is one of those situations in which you’re going to have to talk. As ominous as that sounds, it’s a lot easier than you think. All you have to do is ask her what’s wrong. More than likely, there’s been some kind of misunderstanding and all you’ll need to do is (gently) correct her perception. If the issue is larger, you’ll need to have a deeper conversation. Either way, you can pretty much bank on fantastic makeup sex later on.
More From AskMen.com:
Dealing With a Jealous Girlfriend
She Needs a Break
Female Manipulation Tricks
5 Things You Didn’t Know: Women
Red Flags Women Look For
3. Flirting With Other Men in Front of You
Women who pull this power play require more attention than they’re currently receiving. Flirting with other men helps her fill a void of some kind. The void may stem from a deeper insecurity, or it may stem from having a boyfriend who just doesn’t pay enough attention to her. But neither situation excuses this kind of tantrum, and acting out in this manner indicates she’s unskilled at communicating her needs. It may also be a sign you’re dating damaged goods.
Stopping this power play: As before, you have two options: intervene or ignore. If she’s the type to get hot when you put her in her place, that could be exactly what she’s after. While those types of exchanges can be highly erotic, realize that allowing her to provoke you with her power plays will likely result in more of the same behavior. If she’s not that kind of girl, your best bet is to ignore it and address it when you get home. And address it you must — there’s no excuse for this kind of tantrum. If she doesn’t straighten up immediately, it’s probably time to get a girlfriend who respects you (and herself).
4. Delaying Response to Your Texts or Calls
If your girlfriend typically responds to your text messages and phone calls within an hour or two, but suddenly goes an entire day without getting back to you, something’s up. She’s either angry (read: hurt) about something, or she’s no longer interested. The latter doesn’t usually happen overnight, so this is probably her way of letting you know she’s unhappy with you.
Stopping this power play: When she pulls this power play, don’t fall into the phone-tag trap — it’ll only exacerbate the situation. If your messages aren’t being returned, stop sending them and wait until you can talk face-to-face. Start by asking what’s upsetting her; don’t even bother addressing the fact she’s been ignoring you, since that’s not the real issue here. Besides, you’d only be reinforcing her behavior by letting her know it bothered you. Once you’ve cleared the air, the power play will end on its own.
5. Marking Her Territory
This kind of behavior is one of the most natural power plays for women to indulge in, whether they realize it or not. If she’s cognizant of her actions, they could be blatant: leaving silk panties on the floor, forgetting her Tampax box in the bathroom, etc. It could also be far less obvious: tidying up your bedroom, cleaning the bathroom, etc. These are details another woman would notice immediately, as few bachelors excel at housekeeping. It’s also something your friends would notice, giving the instant impression she’s more than just a bed buddy.
Stopping this power play: You may not want to counter this power play, but you should think twice before letting her scatter lingerie around your apartment. Allowing her do so will send the message you’re allotting her space in your home, which gives the impression you consider her a girlfriend. If she is, there’s no harm done. If she’s not, you could have a screaming banshee on your hands when she discovers someone else’s panties in your clothes hamper. If you’re dating other women, do not let her mark her territory. Gather her belongings and hand them back as though she’s accidentally left them behind. A normal woman will take the hint.
Keep the Ball in Your Court
All women throw temper tantrums once in a while — some are just better camouflaged. Sometimes she’s hurt, while sometimes she’s just being a brat. No matter the cause, it’s important to stop her manipulating power plays as soon as they surface. The next time she stomps her feet, use these tips to defuse and resolve the situation. Not only will she respect you for it, but she’ll also be less inclined to pull that power play in the future.
How To Handle a Girl Who’s Not Responding to Texts–Here’s How to Get Her to Text You Back FAST (And Then Some)…
From ghosting to dwindling texts back, it can be hard to figure out how to get a girl to text back–particularly if you think you’ve done everything right.
Texting should make dating more accessible and fun, but like most technology, it can be complicated.
According to research, 65% of the world’s population globally sends & receives SMS messages.
Don’t worry–that’s why we compiled this handy guide on how to become a text message dating guru, and exactly what to say when she doesn’t text back.
Because a poll of 2,201 adults found 62% of women prefer to text rather than talk, versus 38% of men… so these days, knowing how to text is more important than ever.
Let’s get started:
How To Get a Girl to Text Back, Every Time
Him: “Hey Ashley, how’s it going?”
Her: “Pretty good, thanks, u?”
Him: “I’m fine, just eating lunch…what are your plans this week?”
We’ve all been there before — you’re texting her and the conversation seems fine…
Then all of a sudden, she’s gone.
You had her right there — or at least, you thought you did — so what the hell happened? And where do you go from here?
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Figuring out why didn’t text back or where the conversation went wrong is a problem many guys face in today’s world.
That’s why we made this easy-to-follow video to teach you some of the best tricks for getting a girl to text you back. We’ll also show you:
- What to say when she doesn’t text back…
- How to easily get the conversation flowing again…
- Easy ice-breakers that she can’t resist…
- Ways to get her to respond to you (without every texting a word)…
- How to quickly make her remember why she liked you in the first place…
Use these tips to reignite any conversation and move yourself to the front of her mind. You can also use these tips to gauge her level of interest in you.
Now that you know how to get the conversation flowing again, let’s dig a little deeper into some of the reasons why she might have ignored your text, and how to prevent this in the future.
Don’t Make “She Didn’t Text Back” The Norm: Tips For Always Getting a Text Back
Do you know what one of the biggest questions men have regarding dating?
“What’s the best way to text a girl to get her out on a date?”
Some guys aren’t sure if they should call, approach in-person, or simply text.
You might be somewhat surprised but texting a girl to get her into the bedroom is one of the easiest things ever! It doesn’t take much skill at all.
There are millions of women being texted every day and there are millions of girls responding to them…but most of these women haven’t met their potential new partners from being approached on the street.
According to research, 88% of U.S. adults have sexted.
They’re usually Facebook friends, blind-dates, from social circles, co-workers, even online dating and apps now more frequently, etc. But rarely are women meeting men from in line at the store or on the street. Here’s where the dilemma arises!
Here’s the deal… if you’re meeting a woman in real life and you can’t get her out on a date or if she didn’t text back consistently, then chances are it’s not your texting that sucks!
It Was Your Interaction With Her That Sucked!
Just because she gave you her phone number doesn’t mean she’ll meet up with you for a date and it definitely doesn’t mean she’ll hook up with you!
It doesn’t take much to get a phone number from a girl. As a matter of fact, it only takes a tiny bit of interest from a woman to agree to give you her number.
Most guys don’t lose the girl they got a phone number from because of “bad texting.” It was because they didn’t gain her interest right away.
And that’s really why she didn’t text back.
This can cause a lot of distress and wasted energy as a result.
According to psychologist Perpetua Neo:
It’s good to plan for your future, but when you’re planning with somebody else it’s never so simple. Instead of thinking about what do you have in your life right now, you’re thinking about what happens if this person isn’t going to answer, and what happens if this future is not perfect? So we are not enjoying where we are in the moment — instead we are stuck in a future where we think the worst.”
Although texting can be a very powerful tool in your arsenal of tricks, the vast majority of the time it should only be a formality, a prelude to the actual date!
If you’ve increased her interest in you enough, your texting just has to be normal at best to get her out on the date.
If you did just enough to get her number (which isn’t much), then you have a lot of work to do with texting to get her out on a date!
This is honestly why some guys have so much trouble with online dating and dating apps:
Getting her to respond on these things is the same as “getting her number” in real life. You have to make that initial exchange so exciting, so memorable that she can’t wait to get out on a date with you!
It’s Still Good to Know How to Text a Girl…
Of course, you’ll still need to reach out to her via text, so it’s a good thing to know the best way to text a girl.
In fact, you can text a girl into liking you more than she actually does – if you know how to do it right.
On the other hand, you can text her too often or come off as “creepy” if you aren’t careful. But don’t worry, we’ll show you how to avoid this.
How To Always Make It a “Sure Thing”
These days, it’s important to seal the deal before meeting up. If you decide to go out on a date with a girl, you want to know that she’ll be 100% committed to hooking up with you the very same night you have your date.
BRAND-NEW: 7 Hot-As-Hell Sexts That Get Her to Come Over & Strip Down Naked For You…
To do this, just make sure that all the work is done before you meet up. The date is just a formality. Do this, and you won’t see any resistance in getting her back to your place.
Don’t even ask her for a phone number unless all the above is in place or you can be sure it will be a waste of your time (and you’ll be left wondering why she didn’t text back).
Follow this advice and you’ll find that when you do decide to text a girl for the first time, she’ll immediately respond and probably even ask you out first!
So, be sure to feel her out, gauge her interest (and yours), and really make an impression before sending her a text. If you do all of the work up front, you’ll never be left wondering why there was no text back.
Now that you know the best ways to avoid dealing with the feared no text back, we’ll take a look at the social media phenomenon that’s made modern dating harder than ever (and show you how to beat the system).
Why Do Girls “Ghost”? Here’s What Ghostbusters Didn’t Tell You…
We’ll start with the bad news first:
There’s not really one surefire way to stop a girl from “ghosting.”
It’s her decision to not text you back and you can’t quite control what’s going on inside her head.
And the truth is, women do this for a number of reasons.
Maybe she only feels “lukewarm” toward you…
Or perhaps she sees you as more of a “friend”…
And hey, it is possible that she really is that busy with work.
Yes, it’s pretty crappy. And yeah, it’s cowardly too. But it happens.
So what should your next move be?
First off, don’t hound her with questions. Yes, you can text her–but you don’t want to make her feel like you’re “stalking” her. That will just backfire.
You also want to make sure you don’t blow up her phone. Don’t message her directly on social media, and don’t track her down for an explanation.
The key is to think of ghosting as you would any other breakup.
That doesn’t mean it will be easy–usually, it’s not. But at least that gives you some ground rules to play by.
Ultimately, if you’ve been ghosted, you have to find your own closure.
Remember that being ghosted isn’t a reflection of you or your character.
Instead, it’s a reflection of her and her character (or lack thereof).
There’s nothing stopping you from bouncing back into the game.
However, if you want to give it one more shot with her… then we do have some tips for you to try.
3 Questions to Determine Why She’s REALLY Ignoring Your Texts
So, it happened. She didn’t text back and you don’t understand why.
If the waiting turns into days with no response, you’re left thinking:
“WTF is going on with this girl!?! Am I getting no text back on purpose? Or did she just forget?”
And that’s when it clicks. “She ignored my text.”
And it’s an excruciating situation to handle.
But before you can even think about what to do next, it’s important to understand the real problem — why she ignored your text (or texts) in the first place.
The Ugly Truth About Why There’s No Text Back From Her…
Here’s the bottom line:
If you send her multiple texts and don’t get a single response, it means she isn’t interested.
And if she isn’t interested, then she’ll never agree to meet up with you.
You could stew in your own frustrations…
Or send her angry texts you might regret later…
But the more proactive approach is to think about what actually caused her to do this.
Because at the end of the day, this girl gave you her number.
And that means that at one point, she was interested in you…
So at some point along the way, something happened that caused her to lose interest.
With that in mind, here’s a little quiz:
Ask yourself these 3 questions about your initial interaction with her to determine why she’s really ignoring your texts.
1) Was the conversation interesting?
Maybe the conversation wasn’t a nonstop thrill ride, but you still left satisfied because you got her number.
Well, that doesn’t change the fact that she may have left the conversation feeling bored…
And if she’s already bored, she won’t waste any energy responding to your texts.
So what can you do to “fix” this?
Look back for clues to help you figure out things you said that you might want to change the next time around.
Were you keeping the conversation fun and interesting? Did she seem fully engaged?
If not, then the problem was likely that you have little in common – which is fine.
Next time you’re out with a girl, pay attention to how she responds to you. Make a few jokes or try to figure out what she’s interested in to really get the conversation rolling.
2) Did you feel a physical connection?
It’s hard to focus on how you feel when you’re just worried about getting your words out right…
But to the girl you’re talking to, a connection means everything.
You may have seemed like a nice and friendly-enough guy…
But if there wasn’t anything sexual about the interaction between you…you’re probably out of luck.
And that’s because if she can’t picture you as a potential romantic or sexual partner, she’s not going to be interested in meeting up with you again.
And that means she won’t be interested in texting you back.
Did you reach out to touch her at any point during your conversation? The power of touch is proven to spark her sexual interest.
When you show a physical interest in her, then she’ll know you want to be more than friends…
3) Were you needy, desperate, or aloof?
If you’re coming off as needy or desperate, she’s not going to be into you — point blank.
But even if you don’t feel needy or desperate, there are certain actions women pick up on that signal to her brain you might be.
So if you repeatedly buy drinks for her and her friends…
Or you brag and keep trying to impress her…
She’s going to think you’re desperate for her attention and affection.
And that means she won’t want to give it to you.
Women will never value what’s given to them.
And if you keep trying to impress her, she’ll assume you’re just willing to give yourself to her without her having to work for it at all.
On the other hand, you might have acted too aloof.
It’s one thing to refuse to bend over backwards to impress her…
But it’s another to act unconcerned with your surroundings and uninterested in even yourself.
When you’re aloof and disconnected, you can’t participate in the present moment. And she’ll pick up on your “high and mighty” vibe like that.
Remember, she doesn’t need this interaction to go well and lead to something.
And even if you really want it to go somewhere, it’s important to let her know that you don’t need her.
3 Texts to Send a Girl Who’s “Ghosting” You (And How To Get a Girl To Text Back)…
So a girl has “ghosted” you… and you want to know if there’s anything you can send to get a text back from her.
These texts may not work to get her out on a date with you, but they can help bring you closure and may even prevent her from ghosting again.
The key is to be honest in your delivery and to make her feel safe.
That way she won’t worry you’re going to blow up at her if she tells you she’s just not “that interested.”
And yes, this means you need to be prepared to get that response. But hey–at least it’s a response!
So with that in mind, here are 3 texts you can send to get a girl who “ghosted” you to respond:
THE LATEST: These 3 Tinder Secrets Will get You Laid Tonight…
Text #1: “Hey, haven’t heard from you in a while… everything OK? If you’re not interested or too busy, just let me know. I’d really appreciate it.”
Text #2: “My buddy just bailed on me for happy hour. You in? Name a place and I’ll meet you there.”
Text #3: “Important question… are you pro or anti-pumpkin spice latte?”
The first text shows your honesty and is also direct, which works if it fits with your personality.
The second text, on the other hand, gets straight to the point if you feel like your previous conversation was a little “wishy-washy.”
And finally, the third text works if you just want a response. It may not rekindle the conversation or solidify a date, but it gives you the best odds of getting a response.
It also betters your chances of getting a date with her.
Like all technology, texting makes dating easier and harder, so understand that sometimes ghosting will happen and you’ll just have to move on. But these tips are the best way to make one final attempt before bailing.
We’ve covered how to put in the world to get an eager text back, how to improve your chances of having her text you, and how to prevent or deal with ghosting.
Next up, we’ll let you in on everything you wanted to know about texting an ex or crush from your past.
One Foolproof “Break Glass in Case of Emergency” Step to Make Her Respond…
Getting a girl’s number is no piece of cake.
So when you have a number that doesn’t go anywhere…
It’s frustrating as hell.
But it’s not necessarily a bad thing.
In fact, it can help you figure out exactly what you did wrong — and that means you can fix it!
So next time you do get a number, it won’t be a wasted effort.
But if you’re just not ready to give up, there’s an easy step you can take as a last-ditch effort to make her respond.
Here’s what to do when she ignores you:
5 “Copy & Paste” Texts That Get Her to Drop Everything & Come Over Right Away…
If you want a hot girl to stop ignoring you…
… always text you back…
… and eventually come over and have sex with you for real…
Here’s the fastest way to do it:
When you want her to come over, send her one of these 5 messages.
You can literally copy and paste these messages, word-for-word, from this guide into your phone…
… and as soon as she sees it, it’s like *BAM* all she can think about is having sex with you.
Even if she was ignoring you for days before then (or weeks, or sometimes even months)… or even if she was in the middle of doing something really important… even if it’s freaking 2 A.M. and it’s raining outside…
… when she sees one of these texts, she’ll get SO obsessed with having sex with you, that she’ll most likely invite herself over to “hang out”. 😉
I think my favorite part is that NONE of the texts explicitly mentions sex… so you can even use them on a shy or reserved girl to get her to come over for sex too (she’ll just think it’s her idea lol).
Here’s what they are and how to use them–enjoy!
How Can I Get an Old Crush to Message Me Back?
Have you ever thought back to a girl from your past, and wondered… what if?
“What if we could be together…?”
“What if we were more than friends back then…?”
Or even simply, “I wonder what she’s up to now…?”
If so, you’re not alone.
But, if you’ve tried reaching out to her and you find yourself realizing, “She ignored my text,” then there are a couple factors to consider.
So what’s the best way to reconnect with a girl from your past without scaring her off?
This is a complicated question to unpack, because it really depends on your relationship with this girl.
If it ended well or if it’s still positive, then you should have no trouble picking up where you left off (and can use the above texting tips for inspiration)
But if it didn’t end well, or if you said some creepy or offensive things to her, it’s not going to be a simple fix.
The Cold Hard Truth About Girls From Your Past Who Don’t Message Back…
Messaging girls from high school or your past may seem convenient, but it throws up a lot of red flags–and they can sense it.
So, are you wondering what to do when a girl from your past ignores you?
Well, let’s look at the facts. You left high school, and you left those girls behind.
If they weren’t interested in you then, there’s little benefit in trying to get them interested in you now.
So instead, it’s way easier (and faster) to go after hot new girls, who you already know are interested in you.
“How am I supposed to know if a girl is ‘already’ interested in me?” You might be wondering…
And the truth is, it all boils down to a few simple signs.
Let me give you a little quiz to show you what I mean.
Let’s say you’re talking to a girl in a cafe, and things seem to be going well… so you want to ask her out on a date.
How can you know for sure if she’ll say yes?
a) If your conversation lasts for longer than 10 minutes…
b) If she has the “right” body language…
c) If she asks you a bunch of questions about yourself…
d) There’s no real way to know for sure…
If you guessed a, c, or d… well, you’re not alone. Many of our community members used to believe that the key to figuring out a woman’s true level of interest was in her words…
However, in reality… this isn’t the case at all!
Because most girls get hit on a LOT… they don’t like to come off as “easy”…
… so the only real, honest-to-god way to know if a girl is into you… is to look at her body language for some subtle hints that she wants you.
For example, if you see her do this with her hands… or this with her legs… you can be pretty certain:
Deep down, she’s waiting for you to ask for her #… or invite her out on a date… or even go in for the kiss right then & there…
Anyway, many guys in our community have personally told me that knowing these signs has made talking to girls feel a LOT easier… and helped them get way more dates too.
So if that sounds like something you’d like… then I highly recommend you check out this video:
Discover How to Spot a Woman’s “Sex Signs” That Reveal Her True Level of Interest In You…
Do Women Like to Be Ignored?
Ignoring a woman only has an effect if she is attracted and interested in you or if you have other women interested in you at the same time.
If she’s not attracted to you, she won’t care if you ignore her or not.
Do you know how to make a woman attracted to you and then hoping that you pay attention her, ask her out, have sex with her or begin a relationship with her? If not, watch this video to understand how it works…
As you will discover from the video above, most women who are attractive will rarely come across a guy who will offer any type of challenge.
Where Guys Go Wrong
There’s a common misconception amongst guys that goes something like this: If you want to get a woman’s attention, just ignore her. She’ll think that you’re cool and don’t even want her and that will spark her interest.
So, is it true? Do women like to be ignored? Will ignoring a woman make her want you?
If a woman doesn’t feel attraction for you, she isn’t going to care if you’re ignoring her. You’ll just be another random male in the surroundings who wants to bang her, but is pretending like he doesn’t.
On the other hand, if she is sexually attracted to you and you are ignoring her, then yes – that will get her curious and wanting to interact with you more.
Ignoring Her Isn’t Always the Answer
There are certain circumstances in which ignoring a woman can work really well.
For instance: Some guys (including myself) use the “ignore technique” when they are already in a relationship with a woman.
If a woman wants more of her man’s attention because she feels a lot of love, respect and attraction for him, then ignoring her will make her reach out to him. However, if a woman has lost a lot of respect and attraction for him during the relationship and he then starts ignoring her, she’ll usually just begin looking for a new man.
Sometimes, a guy wants to know if a woman is interested in him, so he tries ignoring her or “going cold” to see if she’ll feel desperate and worried that she’s losing his interest. A guy like that mistakenly thinks that ignoring her will suddenly make her feel rejected and want to chase him.
Sure, it will sometimes make a woman curious and she will show some interest to him just to check that he was putting on an act and is still super keen on her, but in most cases she just won’t care because he’s not a guy that she is sexually attracted to.
A woman isn’t going to get excited about a guy ignoring her if he hasn’t yet sparked her feelings of sexual attraction.
For example: Some guys use the “nice guy” approach to women where they essentially act (yes act) like they are just interested in being nice, innocent friends. Yet, secretly, the guy is super keen to have sex with her and is hoping that he will get to be her boyfriend one day.
Yet, using that approach leads to rejection in most cases. Watch this video to understand why…
As you will discover from the video above, it’s not the act of being nice that ultimately gets the guy rejected. What does? The fact that he is refusing to say or do anything that will spark the woman’s feelings of sexual attraction.
So, don’t waste any more time thinking that ignoring women (or any other superficial thing e.g. wearing great clothes, building more muscle) is the answer to success with women.
If you want women to like you in a sexual way, you’ve got to trigger their feelings of sexual attraction for you. If you currently aren’t very good at doing that around beautiful women, you need to improve that about yourself or you will find that most women really aren’t that interested in you.
Ignoring an Ex
In most cases, ignoring an ex girlfriend who doesn’t want to be with you anymore isn’t going to make her coming running back to you.
If you want a woman to feel attracted to you and want to be with you, the best approach is to make her feel something for you when you talk to her on the phone or in person.
You can actively CREATE feelings of attraction inside of a woman. You don’t have to sit around hoping that she feels attracted; you can MAKE her feel attracted.
For example: If a girl doesn’t feel much attraction for a guy and he then interacts with her, displays confidence, makes her laugh and feel good around him, she will then feel more attracted to him than before.
Guys Ignoring Girls in Hollywood Movies
Some guys grow up without a male role model who can explain what women are really attracted to about men.
As a result, a lot of the information that guys get about women tends to come via movies, TV or magazines, music videos or from random things that people say during conversation. It’s a big, confused mess of fantasy, fiction and insecure ideas.
What a lot of guys don’t realize is that movies and TV are primarily designed to entertain audiences. In TV shows and movies, the nice, innocent, sweet guy will get the girl in the end after he saves the day, saves the girl or saves the world.
Aww, how sweet.
If you think about it, most people probably wouldn’t pay to go to the movies if there was no fantasy involved.
If it was always a case of, Boy meets girl. Boy chats to girl. Boy likes girl. Girl likes boy. They go to his house and have wonderful, passionate sex together. The end. people would get pretty bored of going to the movies, right?
To entertain the viewers, the film industry creates complex and unrealistic relationships between the men and women on screen to make people laugh, cry, say “Awww…how cute” and so on.
Women are often portrayed as being mean, snobbish and flaky because that is entertaining for women to watch and scary for many men who just don’t understand that it’s not real…it’s just a movie.
In the movies, men are often portrayed as being weak, insecure, bumbling fools who would be so LUCKY to score with a woman. The relationships and interactions on screen lead some men to think that women like to be ignored, or snubbed, or controlled in order to feel attraction for a guy.
Copying what they see on TV sitcoms or in movies, many modern men waste their time ignoring a woman when, in fact, they should just approach her and get something going between them.
A confident guy who is successful with women doesn’t sit around worrying that a girl might slap him (like they do in the movies), tip a drink over his head (like they do in funny TV sitcoms) or coldly reject him in front of everyone (like they do in music videos where the female pop singer is acting all powerful).
Instead, he knows that women will be naturally attracted to his confidence and that he simply needs to guide a woman from a conversation to kissing, sex and into a relationship. It’s actually a very easy thing to do when you start out by making the woman feel very attracted to you. She wants it to happen.
Be the Confident, Forward Moving Guy That Women Are Hoping to Meet
Single women want you to be confident and walk over and talk to them. They don’t want you to be nervous, shy and hesitant when you approach and act like you are worried that it might not be okay to be talking to them.
They want to see that you believe in yourself and that you have the social intelligence to understand that it’s a man’s role to approach a woman and make something happen. There is nothing wrong with approaching a woman, so don’t be afraid to do it.
Walk up to her and make something happen between you.
Do you have the confidence to approach women that you find attractive? If not, watch this video…
As you will discover from the video above, you have a lot of direct control over the way you feel. You can choose to feel nervous if you want to, but it isn’t going to help you succeed with women.
As a man, you’ve got to do what it takes to build up your confidence with women. You will need it when approaching and talking to a woman for the first time, when you’re on a date with her, having sex with her and deep into a relationship with her.
Confidence is one of the things that initially attracts a woman to a guy and it’s also one of the most important traits that maintains a woman’s attraction when in a relationship.
Traits and Behaviors That Turn a Woman Off
It’s very easy to attract women and turn them on, but it’s also very easy to turn them off. For example a guy who ignores a woman instead of confidently making a move may appear to be:
1. Lacking in self confidence
If a guy approaches a woman in a nervous, almost apologetic – sorry for disturbing you – manner, he comes across as being insecure, weak and unsure of himself. Insecurity is a sign of low self confidence and if a guy doesn’t believe in himself and in his worth, a woman certainly won’t either.
2. Lacking in self esteem
Some guys will have such a low sense of self esteem that when he approaches a woman, he is already expecting her to reject him. If a guy acts like he is not good enough for her, a woman will inevitably pick up on this insecurity and she will respond in kind. No woman wants to waste her time trying to build up a guy’s self esteem.
3. Mentally and emotionally weak
A guy who cannot make up his own mind and doesn’t know how to take action and go after what he wants, inevitably comes across as being mentally and emotionally weak. A woman cannot feel a strong attraction for a guy who is weaker than her because this means that she will have to be the dominant one in the relationship and that she will have to take the lead.
This is a turn off because a woman wants a man who can make her feel like a real woman and when she’s doing all the “hard” work, not only doesn’t she feel like a real woman, she also feels like she is not getting the support she needs from him either.
4. Lacking in social intelligence
Social intelligence is the ability to interact well with other people, whether one-on-one or in groups. It is the ability to conduct an interesting and engaging conversation, read body language and respond in a way that makes everyone feel connected to you and happy to be talking with you.
Despite being academically intelligent, some guys are lacking in the area social intelligence and come across as being boring, uncomfortable or even creepy.
When a guy lacks social intelligence he will be unable to engage a woman and make her feel at ease with him and then to feel attraction for him. He will appear “uncool” and her friends will let her know that he doesn’t fit in with them and that she shouldn’t date him.
5. Lacking in conversation skills
The art of conversation is referred to as such, because being able to have an interesting and engaging conversation with a woman (or anyone for that matter) is like creating a work of art. It’s poetry in motion. You’re literally painting a work of art sometimes or playing together like musicians and creating conversational music based on each other’s input.
Conversation with a woman, when done right, should engage, create interest, cause suspense, create anticipation and ultimately sexual attraction. If a guy trying to attract a woman conducts an interview style conversation with her, simply asking her a series of personal questions, he will only succeed in making her feel uncomfortable and tense.
Alternatively, if he only talks about himself, complains about things or blames others (the government, the rich people, the politicians) about his problems, she will be bored and may even feel offended.
At that point, she will not feel any attraction for him and will want to get away from him as soon as possible.
6. Using an approach that doesn’t fit the situation
Some guys do all the wrong things when they are attracted to a woman. They will wait for the woman to make the first move, hoping that she will choose him. They might snub her during a conversation and hope that she will respond favorably to them.
Some may indeed choose to fully ignore her. Unfortunately, if the guy has not established a strong attraction between himself and the woman, all of these approaches (or lack thereof) will only serve to make her feel angry and she will probably be giving out her phone number or going home with someone else.
Start Paying Attention to Women in the Right Way
Getting a woman to like you and want to be with you doesn’t come down to you ignoring her and hoping that she runs over to you and begs to be your girlfriend.
In the real world, you’ve simply got to spark a woman’s feelings of attraction for you, connect with her and begin the process of making her falling in love with you.
These days, many women are open to having sex on the first night or first date, so don’t make the mistake of acting like you’re not interested in sex.
According to a study done in the USA, 55% of couples admitted to having sex on their first date. Another study in Europe found that 70% of women admitted to having experience a one night stand before.
So, rather than ignoring women or playing complicated mind games, just make her feel attracted, connect with her and guide her to kissing, sex and a relationship…
Free video reveals how ordinary guys get laid or get a girlfriend by using a simple approach that works instantly on all kinds of women…
You are about to discover my personal secret for success with women. This FREE, 21-minute video will BLOW YOUR MIND (I promise!)
One of the romantic difficulties often cited by young women is the lack of certainty, mixed messages from men that blur the status of a relationship. Inspired by the movie inspired by the book inspired by a fake book on an episode of Sex and the City, many have turned to a simplifying mantra: He’s just not that into you. That is, if a woman has to ask if a guy’s into her, he’s probably not. But according to new research from America’s least-selective Ivy League school, that couldn’t be further from the truth.
“Our hypothesis was that these women were living in a state of delusion, phishing for affirmation from their friends and ascribing meaning to otherwise meaningless social gestures,” said Mark Hicks, a wheat farmer and part-time researcher at Cornell University. “Turns out, we were dead wrong.”
Hicks and his colleagues created a study involving 432 undergraduates, both men and women. Both were given a set of sample relationship behaviors commonly observed in men, including things like “infrequent sexual encounters,” “nonsexual pair-bonding activities (dates)” and “late night calls to action (booty texts).” Both men and women were asked to rate the behaviors on a scale of 1-6 in terms of the interest they expressed.
Unsurprisingly, the female undergraduates inferred a great deal of interest from nontraditional behaviors, like “he tells me I’m not like other girls” and “he only texts” late at night. But the real bombshell came when the researchers discovered that men’s interest assignments nearly mirrored the women’s—contrary to popular belief, behaviors meaning “he’s not that into her” in fact mean that he’s VERY into her.
“I’ve been saying this forever,” said Brett, a 3rd-year sophomore at Cornell. “What a girl doesn’t understand is that when I hook up with her for a couple of weeks and then make out with another girl in front of her at a party, I’m not trying to say I’m not into her—I’m trying to show her how miserable I am having to be with someone else.”
“Absolutely,” echoed Brett’s friend Gavin. “I hardly ever text girls I actually like, unless it’s to convey essential information, like how badly I want to see them. Texting is so impersonal, so with a girl I like I’d just assume not text and wait to see her in person. I wish more girls understood that,” he mused.
The results, which have yet to be replicated, spread like cotton candy perfume in a women’s restroom to other girls across Cornell’s campus. One freshman took them as a sign that she’s on the right track.
“My wedding Pinterst board is on fleek right now,” said Madylynne, who’s neither met her Tinder match in person nor heard from him for three weeks. “Sometimes, silence speaks louder than words, you know?
When asked for her take on why the findings run so contrary to so-called “conventional wisdom”, gas station attendant and Cornell psychology head Mary Jenkins didn’t mince words.
“This probably makes me a bad feminist, but bitches can be jealous.”
The Head Pro
LADIES beware. That charming guy who seduced you in a crowded bar may be a
trained “pick-up artist”.
Best-selling book The Game is a training manual for men desperate to pull.
Author Neil Strauss describes his women woes before transforming himself from
a balding geek to a smooth-talking irresistible fella.
But this “man bible” is not just for balding geeks.
It is even reported that ladies’ man Olly Murs has given pal Harry Styles a
copy after reading it himself — although why these two hot lads might need
advice on seduction techniques is anyone’s guess.
A source close to the One Direction star is quoted as saying at the time:
“Believe it or not, Harry hasn’t always been 100 per cent confident around
the ladies. So when Olly told him about the book he was gripped straight
away and read it in a week.
“Harry has been joking that since then his methods of seduction have become
foolproof. His favourite tips are the ones involving talking to hot girls in
“He now knows it’s actually best to ignore the women and focus his attention
on the men in order to draw the girls in. Apparently, it works every time.”
The handbook, that was originally released in America in 2005, offers
further guidelines for the process of seduction, which include:
1. Preparing things to say to girls before going out
2. Telling groups of girls impressive stories
3. Maintaining a cocky and funny attitude
4. Choosing a wingman you can trust
5. Other advice includes bluntly asking a girl: “Would you like to kiss
Interestingly, Strauss follows up this statement with a note that if the
situation isn’t suitable for a kiss then the advice is to simply get the
phone number of the “target” and just leave.
Most of the PUA (Pick-up Artist) techniques are variations of the devices most
men use — flirting, wit, boasting, dressing nicely — to convince girls they
The best pick-up tricks are “peacocking” and “negs”.
To explain: Negs is short for negatives. This is a modern twist on the age-old
playground ponytail-pulling tactic. If you neg a girl it means you insult
her. According to the book, by insulting a woman you are using clever
reverse psychology — not just being horrible.
Strauss gives this example: “You’ve got lovely eyelashes, are they real?”
Peacocking is when a man wears an item of clothing that stands out — a
colourful hat or some snazzy sunglasses should work.
The book recommends wearing something outrageous that the woman is likely to
comment on. That is, apparently, the perfect way to spark up flirty
Boasting that its theories will “change the lives of men”, the book urges the
reader to follow the 11 key steps.
First off, select a target. This is where the man will decide upon his object
of his, er, affection. The second step is on making contact with the
selected target and there is a workshop on how to initially approach women.
Advice includes showing your sense of humour and sharing interesting stories,
paying particular attention to the less attractive women. This technique
will make your target notice you are the centre of attention. The next step
includes a cringe-worthy pre-learnt statement that all men should apparently
have ready to go.
Tell her: “Beauty is common but what’s rare is a great energy and outlook on
life. Tell me, what do you have inside that would make me want to know you
as more than a mere face in the crowd?’
If she begins to list qualities, this is “positive”.
If the target hasn’t run a mile by this point, steps three, four, five and six
are all about getting rid of your competition (other men) before “creating
an emotional connection” with the lady you are seducing. The main thrust of
this step is how to go from flirting to sex. This chapter gives an insight
into obtaining a deeper than physical attraction.
This lesson ends with the author telling the reader that the only time it is
OK to lie to a woman is when she asks how many people you have had sex with.
The next stage of the manual is a step-by-step guide to finding a seduction
location. A seduction location is a place that is a “chick magnet”.
The example in the book is a lavish Hollywood pad with swimming pools,
Jacuzzis and palm trees — if you get one of these you will not fail at
having gorgeous women throwing themselves at you. Finally, one must master
the “Mystery Method”.
This technique is about befriending your target’s companions and ignoring the
girl you actually like. This is a psychological approach that works by
making the target subconsciously think that the PUA is really attractive.
If this story is to be believed (Strauss insists that this is a true story) he
has successfully picked up hundreds of women.
So perhaps Harry Styles’ luck with ladies isn’t all down to his curly hair and
successful pop career. Perhaps he learnt it all from The Game.
The Game published, by Canongate, is £8.99.
SUN man LEE PRICE headed out to test some of the techniques from the book
and to see if they work for the normal bloke – and not just Harry Styles.
PROBABLY the best-known technique from The Game, the book’s definition is:
“neither compliment nor insult, a neg is something in between – an
accidental insult or backhanded compliment.”
I approach a pretty office worker, Jennifer Hobbs, 30, and say: “I love your
shoes – I’ve just seen someone else wearing the exact same pair.”
But, rather than fall at my feet like a One Direction groupie, she just looks
bemused, before asking if I’m joking.
When I explained the book’s “neg” theory, she said: “I’m not really into guys
that are into fashion, so it’s sending out the wrong vibes from the off.”
However she kindly added: “But I guess you did get my attention. Maybe I’d be
a little more forgiving if you were a pop star.”
ANOTHER of The Game’s approaches is the ballsy, completely honest route –
walking up to a woman in a pub or club and saying: “I want to sleep with
Already blushing, I blurt out the line to 20-year-old in a pub.
Her shocked reaction is exactly what I expected – the only surprise is that
she didn’t throw her drink over me.
She says: “I was really shocked by how up-front you were.
“It was a bit crude – maybe I’d be more flattered if I were drunk. That said,
it’s certainly a conversation-starter. Luckily you weren’t quite as blunt
after that, otherwise I would’ve probably ignored you.”
IN the words of The Game: “It’s necessary to stand out in a flashy
and colourful way.”
Human equivalents of the bird’s behaviour include shiny shirts, elaborate
headwear and colourful clothing.
I begin by pulling on a white bandana, a white hat and a colourful headband.
But, as I mooch awkwardly in the vague direction of attractive women, their
only reaction is laughter.
Toning down the look a tad, I wear just the floral headband and approach Amy
Quinlan, 27. She’s immediately responsive – even though she knows what I’m
She said: “I’m aware of The Game as I work in a bar, but I still can’t resist
asking about the headband.
“It’s a brave way of getting a girl’s attention, it definitely breaks the ice.
I think guys should just stick to making girls laugh, though.”
PERHAPS surprisingly, The Game teaches readers to approach groups of women –
explaining “women of beauty are rarely found alone”.
The key to succeeding within a group is to identify the woman you desire most
and IGNORE her.
So I approach a group of girls, identify my HB – hot babe in pick-up speak –
and begin to charm her friends.
But it’s not as straightforward as it sounds. I find talking to one girl
difficult enough, let alone three.
Eventually I explain what I’ve been doing, and all three of the girls laugh –
including my target, Tracy Naido, 22.
She says: “To be honest, at first I did notice you seemed more interested in
the other girls.
“It’s an unusual way to do it, but I can see how it’d work.”
THE Game has had mixed results for me – most of the time it felt like it
worked in spite of itself.
What it did do, though, was give me something to hide behind, to forget about
the anxiety of approaching girls and talking to them.
Maybe, instead of objectifying women as “targets” and playing games to get
their attention, just forgetting those usual worries would be a stronger
Either way, I’m not surprised that Harry Styles has experienced great success
with The Game – after all, he’s a millionaire, pin-up member of the world’s
I’m pretty sure he could say whatever he likes and still get cougars.
Here’s What Nice Guys Need To Do To Actually Get The Girl For Once
I’ve dated nice guys, I’ve been friends with nice guys, and I’ve objectively observed nice guys from the sideline while they sent “good morning” texts and bought flowers. It’s usually unfair to group men of any kind into a stereotype, but we can make that rule permissible for the sweethearts who experience an identical outcome to their time-consuming (and expensive, holy hell) courting and wooing — they never get the girl.
They never even get close to getting the girl. Their text messages are left unread, their DMs are unopened, and the girl they just bought an expensive dinner for has seemingly passed onto the Great Beyond and ghosted them.
Meanwhile, bad boys are cannonballing in p*ssy and do absolutely nothing for it. No, literally… like they aren’t doing anything at all. They just sit there.
It has to be a blow to the ego when you really like someone, but every action you make in an attempt to have that feeling reciprocated pushes her away. It’s like “OK, I just did everything in my power to make her feel special and beautiful, and in return she sh*t on my whole life.”
Resenting women in general would seem like the next logical step in thinking, with abundant evidence supporting the hypothesis that women love assh*les more than nice guys. Right?
I’m going to betray all women for a second (many of whom love to pretend women think nice guys are just as sexy and desirable as bad boys — ROFL, we do not) and try to get our perspective to make sense. After all, men and women have the same end goal — we just prefer different deliveries.
Say you meet a girl and take her out to dinner. The next day, she texts you thanking you for such a great time, asks how your day is going, maybe sends over a thoughtful article on topic with the intelligent discussion you had over dessert. By the end of the week, she’s surprising you with nights in watching the game while she cooks. You would f*cking marry this girl and want to plant your seed in her.
OK, now picture another girl. This one could even be hotter than the last. She’s nice, funny and owns an impressive college degree. Her ass is huge. Throughout the date, she peppers you with questions like, “Would you say you’re an ambitious person? Where do you see yourself in five years? Is it with me? And our children?”
The next day, she’s mailed baby clothes to your apartment with your last name embroidered on tiny matching hats. She texts you thanking you for such a great night, and when you don’t answer after five minutes, she asks if you’re cheating on her. It doesn’t matter how hot and cool she is, you now want to scuba dive into the Pacific Ocean without an air tank.
Remember this feeling, because this is how women feel when you shower us with attention too early in the game.
I know this clingy psycho behavior is not what you’re doing specifically, but I have to exaggerate so that you get it. It doesn’t matter what kind of attention you’re giving us — if it’s too much, you seem like a serial killer. Nice guys are Girl #2; guys who ignore us are Girl #1.
That stomach churning feeling I mentioned is how we feel when a nice guy invests too much too soon. What women find creepy and intrusive could seem sweet and innocent from the male perspective, and it is vital to understand the difference.
When you’ve spent less than a cumulative 48 hours with a girl (and this time could be spread out over three to five dates), you do not know her. I don’t care how great your conversation was, how in-depth you discussed each others’ pasts and presents or how deeply you’ve stared into each others’ eyes.
You know only two things — what she wants you to know, and whether you would put your dick in her.
Whether the combination of the two equals infatuation depends on you, but the simplest fact is that you are still technically strangers in the “Getting To Know Each Other” phase of dating.
When you are still in this 48-hour time period and you decide to text her compliments and affirmation of your interest every single day, ask her on dates every single weekend or offer to spend a ton of money on sh*t she doesn’t need, she doesn’t think, “Oh heavens, he is the Prince Charming I’ve always been searching for!”
No, she thinks, “He’s obsessed with me, and I can do whatever I want.”
She is not going to respect or value you.
Just like the girl sending monogrammed baby clothes, you have erased any sense of urgency from the potential relationship with your early investment. If anything, you’ve sent her backpedaling to placing you in the “option” category before she even knows you. Even though you just want her to like you, you are now considered overly available.
As women, we are fully aware that we have done nothing at this point to warrant your loyalty or admiration besides sit there and not be horrible.
We do not think “Yes, Lord! Finally, a man who sees me!”
We just assume you’re either lonely or horny. We also know we probably won’t have to put in any more effort to keep you around because clearly you’re devoting all of your available energy into us and only us.
So, you will, by default, either scare us off if we aren’t hunting for a relationship (and contrary to popular belief, many single Millennial women aren’t), or we’ll put you on the back burner while we continue to f*ck around, because we know you’ll be there.
It sounds f*cked up. I get that, but it’s actually a predictable concept.
I’ve gone on dates with guys who were perfect on paper — sweet, intelligent, attentive…ugh, really just too attentive. They would attempt to monopolize my free time by asking to see me on every day off, which would potentially take away from time spent with my friends and family.
For my sanity I need time for girl-only nights, to work out, clean my apartment and, honestly, just spend some days alone to recharge and watch alien documentaries. When I have sh*t to do and a guy won’t stop bugging me I think, “Jesus, if he could just go away and ignore me for one week, I would actually like him.”
It isn’t fair to a woman to impose any amount of commitment on her immediately, whether that expectation is to text you constantly or spend all of her free time with you. She probably has stuff to do, and until she is your girlfriend, you should assume there are other guys on the table as well.
It also isn’t fair to YOU, boys, to invest all of your time and energy into someone who is not in a position to appreciate it. Don’t set yourself up for failure. If she isn’t receptive to your advances, it doesn’t mean she’s an ungrateful bitch. She probably just doesn’t want it.
Girls usually just like to have sex with bad boys because challenges become conquests, and conquests are fun. We rarely settle down with these guys. The one thing “bad boys” (ew, can we come up with a better name for them?) do right is they give us enough space to miss them.
Please, believe me when I say you do not have to turn into an obnoxious assh*le to make girls like you. There is only one thing you need to do to stop coming off as the needy nice guy: leave her alone.
It’s that simple. Leave her alone, stop blowing up her phone, stop asking what she’s doing every second of the day. If you have already been putting in strenuous amounts of effort to get her attention and receive radio silence in return, it’s not too late to back off. Stop trying to woo her, stop trying to create a fairy tale. I can’t say it enough times: Leave. Her. Alone.
All you have to do is relax and spend the majority of your time focusing on creating a fulfilling life for yourself that will attract other people by default. It’s a win-win situation because you will have you own self-created happiness to fall back on.
Plus, you won’t have to pretend to be busy and ignore a girl you like, which constitutes as playing games — the most immature and counter-productive move you could make.
Hang out with your friends, volunteer, and get some work done. I don’t know, ride a bike or something. You should genuinely be busy with work or your other hobbies and obligations.
Then, when you are free, ask her on a nice date and take your time getting to know her. Treat her well. She will find you more attractive for having a well-rounded lifestyle, and the time you do spend together will not be taken for granted.
Live with the vibe that you are a fun, successful and well-liked person, and you will continue to be that person with or without a girlfriend. It’s OK to acknowledge that it would be nice to share your fulfilling life with someone else, but know your life will not lack substance in any way without a counterpart.
Women do not like guys who ignore them because we think they are disinterested or don’t care. We value men with busy and dynamic lives, and we love that when they are available, they CHOOSE to spend some of that free time with us. Or, they bring us along for the fun things they already have planned and share what keeps them feeling fulfilled. That is what makes us feel special.
Nice guys want to be nice — I truly believe that. If you abstain from sabotaging a potential relationship with an overabundance of attention too soon, you can give her a chance to really digest what you have to offer and whether or not you would fit well together. So don’t f*ck it up.