Your pleasure is important. (Picture: Getty)

Okay, before we get into this, I have something important to say.

Sex is not all about orgasms. You can still have a great time without having one. Sex is not a goal-based activity that’s only being ‘done right’ if you both have an earth-shattering climax. The female orgasm is not activated through the pressing of a button, it doesn’t happen every time, and neither person has failed if it isn’t achieved – as long as you’ve both enjoyed yourself.

That being said, orgasms are a glorious thing.

And throughout masturbation month (that’s the month of May, by the way. Pop it in your calendar for next year), what we’ve really been getting at is the idea that if you want a better sex life and, as a result, better orgasms, the best course of action is having sex solo, and working out exactly what it is that gets you off – and exactly how to do it.

(Picture: Dave Anderson/metro.co.uk)

Which is why the first tip on our guide to having better orgasms is experimenting, and being open to trying new things. Once you’ve got into that open, up-for-exploring mindset, you can move on to the other things on the list to improve not just the likelihood of having orgasms, but also their intensity and general joy.

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Here’s what you need to know to get the best orgasms yet.

Contents

1. Schedule in time to work out what you like

I asked the masturbation geniuses behind OMGYes for their tips on having the best orgasms, and their response was eye-opening.

They gave me a trial of their website, which has interactive (no, seriously, you’re stimulating a woman through your mouse and she’s providing feedback. It’s intense) guides to some ways that real women make themselves come.

(Picture: Getty)

What was really interesting is how specific each of the women were about what works for them. One mentioned how she liked a medium pressure on a certain point to the left of the labia. Another preferred teasing timed to a T.

The only way they could possibly know this? By dedicating some serious time to masturbation, trying things out, and following what feels good.

So copy them. Write it in your planner if you need to. Be open to trusting in your own pleasure.

2. If you’re unsure of where to start when masturbating, here are some moves that lots of women enjoy

Data provided by OMGYes.

Location of touches preferred by women:

  • Around the clit and hood – preferred by 1 in 2 women
  • Brushing over the clit with no pressure – preferred by 1 in 4 women
  • No touching of the clit at all – preferred by 1 in 20 women
  • Pressure on the mons, above where pubic hair grows – preferred by 1 in 12 women

Types of pressure women prefer:

  • 31% of women love pressure so light it glides over the wetness, not even the skin
  • 25% of women love light pressure that moves over the skin, but doesn’t grip
  • 33% of women love medium pressure that gently grips and actually moves the skin
  • 11% of women love firm, massaging pressure that pushes deep into the skin

Type of strokes preferred (most women rotate between several, which is why the % adds up to more than 100):

3. Do your kegels

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No, not just the ones you do every time you read the word ‘kegels’ and remember you’re supposed to be doing something with your vag muscles.

You want to be doing a round of kegels about three times a week to really see the benefits (better orgasms and less likelihood of peeing when you sneeze. Great stuff).

Here’s how they’re done.

How to do kegels:

  • Pretend you’re trying to stop peeing mid-flow. Feel those muscles? Those are the ones you need to squeeze
  • Squeeze the muscles for three seconds, without clenching your stomach, thighs, or bum (if they’re the things that are clenching, you go back to step one) and relax for three seconds
  • Repeat around ten times. Don’t do too many as you may start feeling sore.
  • Once they feel really easy, you can increase the number of seconds you squeeze until you’re up to ten seconds each time

There are also products like LELO’s Luna Smart Bead that can provide feedback on your kegels as you do them, so you won’t be worrying that you’re using the completely wrong muscles.

4. Stop faking your orgasms

But before you do THAT, you’ll need to be honest with your partner and make it very, very clear that orgasms don’t happen every time, and it’s not a failure on their part if it just doesn’t happen. That’s important.

Then you’ll be able to feel more comfortable with not having to fake it, because the pressure to climax won’t be there.

The 24 emotional stages of faking an orgasm

That way you can relax (increasing your chance of having a real orgasm), but it’ll also open up the lines of communication about what does get you off.

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Because if your partner thinks you’re cumming every time, they’re convinced that what they’re doing is working. If it isn’t, it’s time to open up about it and start having the amazing sex you deserve.

5. Don’t underestimate the power of teasing

Sex toy brand LELO told us that the most intense orgasms tend to be the ones that are staved off as long as possible.

‘An orgasm has a kind of potential energy, like a twisted elastic band,’ they explained.

(Picture: Getty)

‘The longer it’s twisted, the more energy it will release, and the same is true of the energy released at climax.’

So go slow and do loads of build up – whether you’re having sex solo or with a partner – and try slowing down just when you’re about to have an orgasm, then slowly starting up again, to tease yourself to a stronger, more intense orgasm.

6. Don’t feel weird about watching porn

You might be into it. Drop the stigma and find porn that you like.

Or, try subscribing to OMGYes. It’s not porn, but offers instructional videos to get you feeling inspired, masturbation-wise. It’s life-changing, trust us.

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7. Remember that the majority of women experience clitoral orgasms rather than G-spot orgasms

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Many people don’t even think the G-spot exists.

So try to focus on stimulating the clit, whether it’s friction, gentle stroking over the hood, or tapping motions that work best for you. Don’t feel like a failure if you’re not cumming through purely penetrative stuff – very few women actually do.

8. Check your medication

If you’re never having orgasms or consistently having weaker orgasms than you’d usually expect, it’s definitely worth checking the side-effects of any medication you’re taking.

(Picture: Getty)

Painkillers can throw off your orgasms, and many anti-depressants can reduce your sexual pleasure. Chat to your doctor about it if you think there’s a problem – switching to a different brand might make things SO much better.

9. Try a new masturbation position

LELO recommends sitting upright with your back against a headboard or a wall, with the soles of your feet facing each other (kind of like that lotus position in yoga). This position improves blood flow to your vagina and allows better control of your muscles, increasing the likelihood of orgasm. Exciting.

10. There are certain times that your orgasms are more intense

Just FYI, where you are in your cycle can affect the strength of your orgasms. A study of 18-35 year old women showed that orgasms are strongest on the 14th day of the menstrual cycle (when you’re ovulating), as the clitoris swells up to 20% more than usual.

So maybe take note and schedule in some downtime then.

11. Be open to trying a sex toy

We get that it can be a bit intimidating to shop for a vibrator for the first time (which is why we wrote up a guide).

(Picture: Dave Anderson/metro.co.uk)

But if you’re struggling to orgasm alone or just want to make things a bit more fun, it’s definitely worth trying out a tool specifically designed for that purpose.

12. Try orgasm-friendly breathing techniques

Kind of like meditation, but for orgasms. Here’s a good guide.

13. Make your orgasms a priority

No, orgasms are not the sole purpose of sex and masturbation, and you can still have pleasure without having one.

But we need to stop acting like being entirely orgasm free every. single. time. is okay. It’s not. You deserve orgasms. They’ll do you a world of good.

6 girls answer the questions boys want to know about female masturbation

If you’re having sex with someone and they’re consistently finishing before you, feeling disappointed that you haven’t come, but not actually asking how to make you climax, you need to bring it up. Now.

Next time you have sex focus on your pleasure. Or if you’re not having sex with other people right now, actively schedule in some time for yourself to have orgasms.

Your pleasure can’t be the bottom thing on your to-do list. It’s important. It’s time to make it happen.

MORE: Why we need to start talking about female masturbation

MORE: Masturbation month: Why masturbating is good for your skin

MORE: 13 reasons why masturbation is arguably hotter than sex

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Find me a man who doesn’t want to have more intense orgasms. It’s next to impossible! We all want to experience those full-body, Earth-shattering orgasms.

If you learned a killer new workout that made your body feel incredible, you’d likely share it with your friends. But when it comes to sex, men aren’t as liable to trade tips. This is a shame, because most men could use some help in the bedroom, both when it comes to pleasing their partner and making their own orgasms stronger.

Because you’re not likely to get much advice from your friends, we spent some time chatting with sexologists and poring over the latest research to see what we could find. In the end, we came up with 11 effective ways for men to take their orgasms and ejaculations to the next level. Strap in and listen up.

1. Touch your taint

If you haven’t already been introduced, meet your taint—or your perineum, if we’re getting technical. It’s the strip of skin between your balls and your butt, and it’s one of many highly erogenous zones that responds well to sexual stimulation. “This area is packed with nerve-endings, so it feels really sensitive,” says Arlene Goldman, Ph.D., coauthor of Secrets of Sexual Ecstasy.

Some guys say that by applying pressure to this area, they’re able to have multiple orgasms—which is probably because you can stimulate your prostate gland externally via your perineum. During intercourse or oral sex, ask your partner to place a finger here and press onto it until the pressure feels just right.

2. Do kegels

Take a tip out of your partner’s sex playbook. “You know how women do kegel exercises and say it strengthens their vaginal orgasm? Men can do the same,” says Alex Robboy, a sex therapist in Philadelphia.

Essentially, kegel exercises are a way of contracting the muscles of the pelvic floor, which give you greater control and intensity during sex. Try lifting your penis up and down with your muscles, or even try to “write the alphabet with the tip of your penis,” suggests Robboy.

3. Change your diet

Getting in shape will help every facet of your sex life, and part of getting in shape is eating better.

Start with greens. Spinach helps dilate blood vessels, which can increase blood flow to the genitals. Other greens like kale, cabbage, and bok choy are good sources of folate, which helps reproductive health.

Next, make sure you’re eating eggs. They’re rich in B vitamins, which ease stress and are important for a healthy libido, which means better orgasms.

Finally, get down with some oatmeal. Oats and whole grains are one of the few natural ways to boost testosterone in your bloodstream. More testosterone equals stronger orgasms.

4. Hold back

Delayed gratification can be hard to master, but when it comes to your orgasm, it’s well worth it. A recent study in the Journal of Sex Research advocated “edging,” or the practice of purposefully delaying orgasm for a more intense climax. The study showed that if people paused when they were about 90 percent of the way to climax, and then resumed after slowing down a bit, their eventual orgasm was way more powerful.

It’s an easy way to amp up your game: Bring yourself to the “edge” of your orgasm, slow down, pause, and then start back up again. Try to do this two or three times before letting yourself go.

5. Find your G-spot

It turns out that men have an equivalent to the G-spot: the prostate. You can stimulate it externally by applying pressure to your perineum, but if you’re interested in maximizing pleasure—and you’re feeling a little adventurous—you’ll have to do a little anal probing.

Have your partner lube up the soft pad of a finger and stick it about 2 inches inside your butt. You’ll know the spot when you feel it: it’s a small, chestnut-sized lump that feels super sensitive. Once you get there, apply some pressure and light thrusting.

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6. Boost your testosterone

The manly hormone that helps you orgasm is the same one that your body produces when you root for your favorite sports team, lift weights at the gym, or watch Game of Thrones.

Research from Athens’ Military Hospital in Greece found that when you have more T in your bloodstream, you’re more likely to orgasm—and do it big. Before your next romp, try some testosterone-boosting activities like going for a run.

7. Stroke your sack

Just before you ejaculate, your testicles rise up near your body to give more power to your ejaculation. “If you press gently upward on the testicles just before ejaculation, it’s likely to be very arousing,” says Goldman.

Ask your partner to place the palm of her hand upward on your balls, moving them a little closer to your body. It’ll heighten your arousal and increase the intensity of your orgasm.

8. Focus on the physical

Sometimes during sex, you’ll get lost in your head—thinking about how hot your partner is, pondering the best porn you’ve ever watched, or even thinking about what’s for dinner. For a better orgasm, return to your body.

Think about it like this: If you’re running, you’ll get a completely different workout if you’re letting your mind wander than if you’re completely concentrating on your form. “Focus on the physical sensation,” says Robboy, and you’ll feel your body responding differently.

9. Just breathe

“This comes from tantric sex, where you’re supposed to move the stroke with your breath,” says Goldman.

Zero in on your breath, and try to slow it down until it’s in tune with your thrusts.

When you’re just about to come, you’ll notice your heart rate and breathing naturally start to speed up—but keeping it slower will improve the amount of oxygen and blood flow that reaches your genitals, making your climax even stronger.

10. Shorten your refractory period

Mentally, you may want to go for another round after achieving a great orgasm, but most guys physically can’t get another erection immediately following sex.

“A refractory period is the time after a man ejaculates when he is no longer able to have an erection,” Emily Morse, sexologist and host of the Sex With Emily podcast, previously told Men’s Health. This period is different for every guy and can last anywhere from minutes to a full day.

However, there are ways to shorten this phase, she explains. The best way to decrease refractory time is by increasing arousal.
“This could be doing something different, like trying out a toy or talking dirty (or dirtier than usual). Even small changes can be just the novelty and excitement needed to rev up the engines for round two,” she said.

11. Lower your blood pressure

First, you should maintain a low blood pressure for the sake of your overall health. However, keeping your blood pressure low can also help with your sex life. That’s because damage from high blood pressure limits blood flow throughout your body–including the penis. This can make it difficult to maintain erections. Plus, high blood pressure is linked to problems with ejaculation and reduced sexual desire, according to the Mayo Clinic.

The Editors of Men’s Health The editors of Men’s Health are your personal conduit to the top experts in the world on all things important to men: health, fitness, style, sex, and more.

Happy National Orgasm Day! Yup, July 31 is the one day of the year dedicated to praising orgasms. Although fun holidays like this one and others in the same vein—National Margarita Day, anyone?—aren’t as established as, say, the Fourth of July, they’re still worth celebrating. And when it comes to National Orgasm Day, the best way to celebrate is by hanging out in bed (or in the kitchen, or on the living room rug, or some other inventive locale) and having an experience that redefines the word “climax.” Here, experts explain 10 techniques to help your vagina feel like it’s Christmas in July.

1. Make it a point to masturbate.

Touching yourself solo can help you understand exactly what you do or don’t like in a way partnered sex can’t. “Getting to know your own body and the type of pressure and friction that feel good really sets a template for knowing how to arouse yourself and have an orgasm during sex,” sex therapist and licensed marriage and family therapist Ian Kerner, Ph.D., author of She Comes First, tells SELF.

2. Fantasize without guilt.

Fantasies can help you forget about the anxieties of day-to-day life, feel less inhibited, and home in on your pleasure, Jessica O’Reilly, Ph.D., Astroglide’s resident sex and relationship expert, tells SELF. “Thinking about a sex act isn’t a sign that you want to live it out in real life, and fantasizing about people other than your current partner is not cheating,” she says.

Kerner agrees. “Don’t underestimate power of mental arousal,” he says. If you’re not sure what gets you going, O’Reilly recommends reading up on Literotica.com for inspiration.

3. Insist upon foreplay so you can get super turned on.

Foreplay primes your body to have the best orgasm possible. “For orgasm to happen, two processes need to occur in parallel,” says Kerner. One is vasocongestion, or blood flow, to the genitals, and the other is myotonia, or muscular tension, he explains. “You can certainly achieve the minimum amount of these necessary to have an orgasm, or you can push beyond that and generate even more vasocongestion, myotonia, and arousal than usual.”

Taking enough time to get as turned on as possible gives your body a chance to maximize these feel-good processes. That extra blood flow increases sensitivity, and the tenser your muscles are, the more likely you’ll feel a huge sense of release during orgasm. Kerner suggests thinking of your entire body as an erogenous zone instead of jumping into the wham-bam-thank-you-ma’am type of deal.

4. Get used to being a little bit selfish—not just in bed, but in life.

“Many of us are so concerned with pleasing our partners that our own pleasure becomes secondary,” says O’Reilly. “As you learn to accept help or pleasure outside of the bedroom, you’ll become more comfortable receiving pleasure during sexual activity with a partner.”

She recommends tactics like asking your partner for a quick massage without feeling like you always have to return the favor, accepting help other people offer up, and learning to say no when someone has a request that really inconveniences you (and that you actually want to say no to, we’re not trying to create a monster here). “Learning to accept help, support, and pleasure is essential to orgasm,” says O’Reilly.

5. Figure out exactly what your clitoris likes.

Kerner calls the clitoris “the powerhouse of the female orgasm,” and for good reason. “Think of the clitoris as the kindling in the campfire that gets the blaze going,” he says. Also, as O’Reilly notes, “Research shows that lesbians have more orgasms than women who have sex with men, suggesting that penis-in-vagina isn’t the ultimate path to orgasm.” While many women need direct clitoral stimulation to orgasm, that can mean different things to different people. Determine what it means for you, then make sure either you or your partner incorporates that during sex. “Even if you’re having intercourse, you can reach down and rub your clit with your fingers or a vibrator,” says O’Reilly. It’s also possible that your clitoris wants less action sometimes—learn to listen to her.

6. But don’t only focus on your clitoris—make sure to mind your mons.

O’Reilly suggests stimulating your pubic mound (aka mons pubis), too. “That fleshy area above your lips is primed to help you enjoy orgasm,” she says. “As you grind against it—use your hands or rub it against your partner’s pubic mound depending on what position you’re in—you simultaneously tug on the hood that covers your clitoral head and shaft.” It can create a kind of stroking motion that she likens to a penis getting a hand job. And beyond the pubic mound, definitely explore toying around with your labia, too.

7. Bring in the G-spot for reinforcement.

Many scientists think the famed G-spot is actually an internal extension of the clitoris, but all that really matters is that paying it attention feels really good for some people. The easiest way to tap into that pleasure is by inserting your index finger (or having a partner insert theirs) a few inches into your vagina, palm up, and curl your finger in a come-hither motion.

Achieving consistent, mind-blowing orgasms is kind of like winning the lottery. Sounds amazing, but basically a pipe dream, right?

Not necessary: There are little tricks that can help you learn how to have a better orgasm. (Yes, more frequently, too.) Hell, it might even improve your relationship.

“In my clinical experience, a lack of orgasm or an orgasm imbalance in a relationship leads to anger, resentment, and frustration with one’s partner,” says New York City sex therapist Ian Kerner, Ph.D., author of She Comes First.

While there are certain things your partner can do to help you out in this situation, you can also take matters into your own hands.

1. Prioritize cuddling.

. Oxytocin—also known as the “love hormone”—might be the key to better orgasms, according to a study in the journal Hormones and Behavior. The study found that couples who received oxytocin in a nasal spray had more intense orgasms than couples who took a placebo.

Since you probably don’t have oxytocin nasal spray on your nightstand, try giving yourself the same jolt of the hormone naturally by hugging, cuddling, or making other gestures to show your love to your partner. Your sex life will thank you. Your orgasms will surprise you.

2. Take an orgasm ‘break.’

It seems counterintuitive, but “sometimes taking a masturbation and orgasm break for a day or two can be a good ‘refresh,’” Kerner says. “I’ve noticed in both men and women that they report stronger orgasms during masturbation after taking a short break.” If you can, try taking sex or solo love off the table for a day or so and see where that gets you. This simple reset may be just what you need to ramp things up.

3. Focus on your clitoris.

Your clitoris, that little nub at the top of your inner vaginal lips, can spark some serious pleasure. So, focus on sex positions that directly stimulate it, suggests Jennifer Wider, M.D. “That can provide a consistent orgasm in the majority of women,” she says.

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Try woman on top, which allows you to grind your clit against your partner, or rear entry, with you or your partner stimulating your clitoris.

4. Use a vibrator.

After all, they exist to give you orgasms. “For many, vibrators increase the frequency and intensity of orgasms—whether you’re alone or with a partner,” says Jess O’Reilly, Ph.D., host of the @SexWithDrJess Podcast. Look for one that either targets your clitoris, G-spot, or both, she says.

Here’s a few to get you started:

5. Think about your cycle.

If you feel like your orgasms have been meh or not even there lately, consider trying to time sex around your cycle. “A woman’s libido peaks during ovulation, and her chances of having an orgasm will go up during this time period,” Wider says. (If you’re not trying to make a baby, just make sure you’re covered on protection during this time.)

6. Don’t hold back on the lube.

“Lube leads to higher levels of arousal, pleasure, and satisfaction,” O’Reilly says. Not only that, it’s a pretty handy tool to have in the bedroom. “You can safely engage in a wider range of acts, techniques, and positions when you use lubricant,” O’Reilly says. “This variety is also linked with more orgasms and greater sexual satisfaction.”

7. Slow down the foreplay.

Having an orgasm requires a few key ingredients, Kerner says: vasocongestion (i.e. blood flow to your pelvis), myotonia (muscular tension throughout your body), and turning on your brain’s natural opiate system (that aforementioned love hormone). “Let all of that simmer and emphasize gradual building up arousal rather than a race to orgasm,” he suggests. The end result will be worth the wait.

8. Whip out a fantasy.

.

Adding a little psychological stimulation to the equation can help enhance physical stimulation, which is why Kerner recommends fantasizing on your own or with your partner. “Fantasy is also a powerful way to take your mind off other stressors or any other anxieties you may be experiencing,” he says. And, for the record, “it’s okay to fantasize about someone other than the person you’re having sex with,” Kerner says. (Maybe just keep that info to yourself.)

9. Take some senses out of the equation.

“The simple act of turning off the lights, closing your eyes, using a blindfold, or wearing sound-canceling headphones can help you to be more mindful and in the moment during sex—and lead to bigger, stronger orgasms,” O’Reilly says. “This is because the deprivation of one sense can heighten another, so when you remove your sense of sight or sound, you may naturally tune into the physical sensations of the sexual encounter. “

10. Feel yourself up in the shower.

Sure, you shower to get clean, but take a minute or so to embrace your body when you’re in there. “It’s very simple: as you shower, rather than touching to wash yourself, take one minute touch for sensuality and pleasure,” O’Reilly says. “Feel your skin as the warm water drapes itself over it. Take a deep breath and bask in the heat and warmth that surrounds your entire body.” This can help you de-stress and get in touch with what feels good to you—and that can do you a solid when you’re in bed later, she says.

7 Tips for a Better Orgasm

“You can do these exercises anytime, anywhere, and no one will know,” Wolfbrandt says. To make Kegels even more challenging, she suggests trying Lelo Luna Balls, made famous by the book 50 Shades of Grey. Or try practicing with a tool like the Magic Banana.

Make it Hot

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Temperature is often overlooked as an important variable in achieving the strongest 
orgasms, and we’re not just talking about the heat between the sheets!

“A Dutch study once showed that women have an almost 30 percent higher likelihood of achieving orgasm if their feet are warm as opposed to cold,” says Dylan Thrasher, relationship coach and author of How to Find and Create Lasting Love. “As unnatural as it may seem, putting on socks during sex will help you achieve a more powerful orgasm, or better yet, try a foot massage using heated massage oils to really rev things up.”

Mind-Body Connection

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When it comes to sexual pleasure, for women, it’s much more ‘mental’ than it is for men. “People say the brain is the most important sex organ and for good reason,” Thrasher says. “It’s important to quiet those annoying thoughts that interrupt intimate times.”

An emotional connection helps as well. “Having a strong connection with your partner strengthens the quality of lovemaking and specifically, orgasms,” Thrasher says. “A woman should feel cherished, appreciated, understood, accepted, and wanted “

Don’t forget those fantasies. Fantasizing about your partner or even reading an erotic novel like 50 Shades of Grey can make sex that much hotter.

Spice Up Those Senses

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Before getting down to business, consider some light ‘sensation play’ to really get your nerve endings begging for more, Katz advises. “Whether it is a gentle massage with lightly scented massage oil or a flirty spanking on the butt, playing with your senses can turn some people on more than an hour of oral sex. Consider adding a blindfold, feathers, satin, fur, candles, and more to your sexy drawer for a variety of fun ways to lavish in sensation play before really ramping up to bedroom romping,” she adds.

Fake it Till You Make it

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No, we don’t mean fake those orgasms! Instead, pretend like you know what you’re doing in the bedroom, even if you don’t, Katz advises.

“The more confidence you have, the sexier it is, and the sexier it is, the more you and your partner enjoy yourselves, and the more confidence you really will have,” she explains. “So even if you’re not sure about trying out a new move or position, or trying out an act for the first time, just remember to breath, and go at it like you’re having the best time of your life!”

Forgotten Erogenous Zones

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It’s not all about the G-spot anymore. According to the founder of Loveology University Dr. Ava Cadell, people are missing out on intense orgasms that come from other often forgotten erogenous zones.

“Nipple stimulation alone can produce an orgasm. For women, having their breasts caressed and nipples sucked releases oxytocin, the chemical that makes them feel like they are in love. This is an area that many men enjoy stimulating during foreplay but rarely think of as having orgasmic potential.”

A little farther down, there is a place of pleasure known as the A-spot. “That stands for Anterior Fornix, also known as the Epicentre or Female Prostate,” Cadell explains. “It’s located inside the vagina on the upper wall even deeper than the G-spot. It can be stimulated with a finger, penis, or sex toy.”

And if you’re looking for that sometimes-elusive G-spot, Dr. Cadell explains it’s usually located “inside the vagina between 11 and 1 o’clock, with 12:00 on an imaginary clock pointing towards the navel.”

For optimal pleasure, combine all primal zones. “Guys, send her to another world by combining kissing, nipple play, and clitoral touches,” Cadell says.

  • By Jené Luciani @JeneLuciani

If you learned a killer new workout that made your body feel incredible, you’d likely share it with your friends. But when it comes to sex, men aren’t as likely to trade tips. And that’s a shame. So we’ll get the sharing party started: After chatting with sexologists and pouring over the latest, hottest research, we found these eight ways to take your orgasm to the next level.

1. Touch your taint.

If you haven’t already been introduced, meet your taint – or your perineum, if we’re getting technical. It’s the stretch of skin between your balls and your butt, and it’s a one-way ticket to Pleasuretown.

“This area is packed with nerve-endings, so it feels really sensitive,” says Dr Arlene Goldman, coauthor of Secrets of Sexual Ecstasy.

Some guys say that by applying pressure to this area, they’re able to have multiple orgasms – which is probably because you can stimulate your prostate gland externally via your perineum. During intercourse or oral sex, ask your partner to place a finger here and press onto it until the pressure feels just right.

2. Do kegels.

Take a tip out of her sex playbook.

“You know how women do kegel exercises and say it strengthens their vaginal orgasm? Men can do the same,” says sex therapist Alex Robboy.

Essentially, kegel exercises are a way of contracting the muscles of the pelvic floor, which give you greater control and intensity during sex. Try lifting your penis up and down with your muscles, or even try to “write the alphabet with the tip of your penis,” suggests Robboy.

3. Hold back.

Delayed gratification can be hard to master, but when it comes to your orgasm, it’s well worth it.

A recent study in the Journal of Sex Research advocated “edging,” or the practice of purposefully delaying orgasm for a more intense climax. The study showed that if people paused when they were about 90 percent of the way to climax, and then resumed after slowing down a bit, their eventual orgasm was way more powerful.

It’s an easy way to amp up your game: Bring yourself to the “edge” of your orgasm, slow down, pause, and then start back up again. Try to do this two or three times before letting yourself go.

4. Find your G-spot.

It turns out that men have an equivalent to the G-spot: the prostate. You can stimulate it externally by applying pressure to your perineum, but if you’re interested in maximising pleasure – and you’re feeling a little adventurous – you’ll have to do a little anal probing.

Have your partner lube up the soft pad of a finger and stick it about 2 inches inside your butt. You’ll know the spot when you feel it: it’s a small, chestnut-sized lump that feels super sensitive. Once you get there, apply some pressure and light thrusting.

5. Boost your testosterone.

The manly hormone that helps you orgasm is the same one that your body produces when you root for your favorite sports team, lift weights at the gym, or watch Game of Thrones. Research from Athens’ Military Hospital in Greece found that when you have more T in your bloodstream, you’re more likely to orgasm – and do it big. Before your next romp, try some testosterone-boosting activities like going for a run.

6. Stroke your sack.

Just before you ejaculate, your testicles rise up near your body to give more power to your ejaculation.

“If you press gently upward on the testicles just before ejaculation, it’s likely to be very arousing,” says Goldman.

Ask your partner to place the palm of her hand upward on your balls, moving them a little closer to your body. It’ll heighten your arousal and increase the intensity of your orgasm.

7. Focus on the physical.

Sometimes during sex, you’ll get lost in your head – thinking about how hot your partner is, pondering the best porn you’ve ever watched, or even thinking about what’s for dinner. For a better orgasm, return to your body.

Think about it like this: If you’re running, you’ll get a completely different workout if you’re letting your mind wander than if you’re completely concentrating on your form.

“Focus on the physical sensation,” recommends Robboy, and you’ll feel your body responding differently.

8. Just breathe.

“This comes from tantric sex, where you’re supposed to move the stroke with your breath,” says Goldman.

Zero in on your breath, and try to slow it down until it’s in tune with your thrusts. When you’re just about to come, you’ll notice your breathing naturally start to speed up – but keeping it slower will improve the amount of oxygen and blood flow that reaches your genitals, making your climax even stronger.

Everyone wants to experience their best possible orgasms, right? Believe it or not, you can actually train yourself to have bigger, better, more fulfilling ones—with a little bit of practice, of course. Sex expert and relationship coach Lila Darville, part of the Well+Good Council, believes that “edging” can help anyone shift from being climactic to fully orgasmic. Here’s how to try it for yourself.

In the world of sex, climax is sometimes referred to as the genital sneeze. (Evocative, right?) Those brief few seconds of pelvic contractions and peak pleasure are typically triggered by focused clitoral stimulation. It’s a sharp rise of pleasure or energy, followed by an expulsion of that energy, just like a sneeze.

Orgasm, of course, isn’t the goal of every sexual encounter (in fact, I highly recommend spending more time engaging in foreplay without a “main event”) and not all women experience orgasm the same way. But if the Big O is your goal, you want it to be energizing, transportive, fulfilling, connective, and undeniably pleasurable—right? If it’s not, then you may be experiencing climax (or a genital sneeze) rather than your orgasmic potential.

There are many ways to shift from being climactic to being orgasmic, but one of my favorites is called edging.

The more you can build the sexual energy present in your body, the stronger and longer your orgasms will be.

Edging, sometimes referred to as prolonged orgasming or teasing, happens when you consciously increase your pleasure by approaching climax but ease away before reaching it. Edging takes a little practice, mostly because climax can be tempting and we love a instant gratification. But by repeatedly approaching the point of no return and then backing away from it, you increase the amount of energy in your body. (And, according to my fellow Well+Good Council member Alisa Vitti, can improve your overall health.) The more you can build the sexual energy present in your body, the stronger and longer your orgasms will be. Or, you might even find yourself experiencing orgasmic pleasure outside of what you originally defined as an orgasm.

The key to edging is becoming aware of your pre-climactic signs and then using one of the following techniques to draw yourself away from it. A little verbalization is often needed, so it’s best to try on your own before introducing a partner.

Woman having an orgasm

Here are 3 tools that can greatly help you increase the intensity of your orgasms.

Edging

Gents, while this won’t sound like it’s for your benefit at first, it really is.

The practice of edging is the art of stimulating the relevant bits, bringing yourself or the other person as close to the edge of orgasm as possible, and stopping before climax occurs.

So you might want to practice this alone first, because it may take a bit of practice to get right.

Set yourself a target of edging a certain amount of times before you climax when you masturbate.

READ: Adult films for women

As that target gets easier, set the target higher, until you reach a maximum you’ve set – maybe as high as fifteen or twenty edges.

This is going to achieve two things: first, you’ll last significantly longer and have much better control over your orgasms, and secondly when you do finally release it will be explosive.

Once you’re comfortable doing this on your own, start introducing it in sex, edging yourself as far as possible, as many times as possible.

Once you have control over that, take control and start edging your partner’s orgasms – most women will thank you for it – sincerely thank you for it.

READ: 10 Things you should never think of during sex

Your new erogenous zone: your earlobe

In NeuroLinguistic Programming, one of the key tools is a process called anchoring – basically we get your body to make an association between a sensation or emotion and a physical movement.

The way it works is that at the peak of the emotion or sensation, you make a specific movement for two to three seconds.

Every time you reinforce this association, the anchor gets stronger, until eventually you can trigger the sensation just by using the anchor. In this case, we’re going to anchor orgasms to earlobes.

We’re using earlobes because they’re usually close to your mouth at the point of orgasm.

Simply put what you’re going to do is, when your partner reaches the height of their orgasm you’re going to suckle on their earlobe for two to three seconds.

Next orgasm, you do the same, on the same earlobe, suckling in the same way.

What this does is twofold: first it anchors multiple orgasm experiences onto that earlobe, so eventually you land up experiencing the sensations of multiple orgasms when the trigger is used.

Secondly, the anchor can eventually be loaded up until you will be able to trigger an orgasm by simply suckling on your partner’s earlobe. Who knew?

Synchronised Breathing

Okay this one’s for the ladies and romantics out there. It takes a bit of practice but yields amazing results when you want to feel more emotionally bonded and connected through sex.

The first thing you need to do is practice a bit of synchronized breathing with your partner – use counting in the beginning, e.g. in, 1, 2; hold, 1, 2; and out, 1, 2. It doesn’t matter if you hold in the middle or how long each in and out breath is, it only matters that the two of you find a rhythm and pace that suits you for the breathing.

Once you’ve mastered the synchronized breathing, you can use this exercise in one of two ways:

Put your foreheads together so that your eyes are a few centimetres apart.

Look deeply into each other’s eyes while you practice synchronized breathing for a predetermined time or amount of breaths.

It feels awkward at first, but once you’re comfortable you can try using a song to time the exercise. Use this to connect emotionally before and after sex.

The other way to do this is to look into each other’s eyes and/or synchronise your breathing during orgasms.

Be warned though that something this intense can cause a release of emotion, so don’t panic if you do it the first (or even tenth or twentieth) time and your partner bursts into tears.

This exercise can make you feel very emotionally vulnerable, but very close and bonded.

How to increase your sex drive, according to an orgasm expert

Some people are, ahem, in the mood all the time. Others, well, aren’t. And differing sex drives can be an issue in relationships.

There could, however, be one simple way to make yourself want to jump into bed with your partner though: go for a run.

According to neuroscientist Dr Nicole Prause, this is a way of almost tricking yourself into feeling like you can’t resist your partner.

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“Generally speaking, if your heart rate is increased and you see your partner, you’re more likely to interpret your excitement as due to your partner. Even if it’s not,” Dr Prause told The Times.

She also revealed that there’s no such thing as an aphrodisiac and recommends sexting while at work: “Starting to be sexual and talking about fantasies. That may help get things started.”

What’s more, the 38-year-old believes arousal has become more responsive and less spontaneous than it used to be, which means you might sometimes have to start engaging in sexual stimulation before you really want it: “You start hugging, you kiss… you start to have those urges,” she says.

Dr Prause is a female orgasm expert based in Los Angeles, who spends her days measuring the brain responses of patients while they orgasm.

She believes the UK is more open than our more prudish American neighbours across the pond, and concedes that there’s still a lot more scientific research to be done into orgasms.

And the female orgasm in particular.

Shape Created with Sketch. Sex toys designed by women – in pictures

Show all 8 left Created with Sketch. right Created with Sketch. The Vesper designed by Ti Chang

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US sex toy designer Ti Chang

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The Vesper is produced in silver, rose gold and gold.

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The PopDildo which can be used for semination

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The Fin clitoral simulator designed by Alex Fine and Janet Lieberman

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The Vesper designed by Ti Chang US sex toy designer Ti Chang The Vesper is produced in silver, rose gold and gold. The PopDildo which can be used for semination The Fin clitoral simulator designed by Alex Fine and Janet Lieberman

“The male genitals are just easier to measure. We already understand quite a lot about how the penis works, because it is so accessible,” Dr Prause says.

“It is literally just harder to study the vagina because it’s internal. The types of imaging, when you can get access to them even, aspects are blocked by the bladder.”

However she concedes that there are other reasons we know less about female sexuality such as: “guy stuff, basic sexism issues, seeing male sexuality as more important.”

Dr Prause believes that relaxing is key to orgasming: “You have to release control. So if you’ve got the laundry list going through your head, ‘I’ve got to pick up the kids soon, before I get the car, I’ve got to do the oil change’, there will be no orgasm in your life.”

Disappointingly, Dr Prause claims that 15 to 20 per cent of women are physically unable to orgasm, which is known as being “anorgasmic”.

It’s not all bad news though, as women are apparently having much better sex than we were decades ago. Dr Prause says women are: “More desired, less functional, more likely to initiate sexual encounters, more likely to report orgasms from sexual encounters.”

What’s more, our ability to orgasm is actually hereditary, Dr Prause reveals: “Orgasm is heritable; that means that, genetically, people whose mums had orgasms and orgasmed more consistently are more likely to orgasm themselves.”

Whether you feel bold enough to ask your mother about her orgasmic history is your call.

The Independent’s Millennial Love group is the best place to discuss to the highs and lows of modern dating and relationships. Join the conversation here.​

Is it true that a simple change in position can make you orgasm harder than ever before? What about kegel exercises for men — can they help you ejaculate harder than ever? Or edging: Should you build up that orgasm for hours, teasing yourself through a slow, super-long arousal period before you blow? Should you start experimenting with prostate play? Do you need to see a masturbation coach to help you have sex like a champ? Or should you just wait a while between orgasms? (After all, there’s only one reliable way to make your loads bigger.) Finally, are any of the sex tips you read on Reddit actually helpful?

Basically, there’s a ton of info, rumors, urban legends and internet tips out there about sex, masturbation, penis health, ejaculation and better male orgasms out there. What’s real and what’s, well, just a load of spaff? Let’s dive in.

For all the masturbating men do, the orgasm can feel awfully rote. Sometimes we feel like emotionless cum machines, genetically predisposed to ejaculate and ejaculate again until we die, never being able to differentiate between one orgasm and the next. So how to turn up the heat and give our dicks the most memorable climax yet?

I reached out to some experts specializing in sex and orgasms — including two sexologists and a neurologist who studies the mid-climax brain — to find out.

What the Science Says About More Intense Orgasms

“You might hate the answer, but an orgasm is an orgasm is an orgasm,” says Nicole Prause, neuroscientist and founder of Liberos, a biotechnology company specifically studying and measuring the human orgasm. According to Prause, any and all available research on orgasm up to this point says there is no way to feel a “stronger” climax.

“They are reflexive, so they’re not thought to vary much in terms of physiology,” she says, referring to the physicality of orgasms — i.e., the number of contractions and intensity of contractions.

“Further, there is no evidence that kegel exercises actually improve orgasms, and this seems unlikely given the nature of the physiology,” Prause continues, striking a dagger into an empire of sexual content online. “Similarly, the ‘hour-long’ orgasm, or similar extended orgasm experiences, have never been documented,” she adds, twisting the knife.

Prause says there is “simply no funding for basic sex research like that,” so as of right now, there is no lab-studied, peer-reviewed scientific proof of being able to control the intensity of orgasms.

But that doesn’t mean the door is shut on blasting a load so hard your neighbors call the cops.

Or as Prause puts it: “People certainly report feeling that orgasms are very different, however, and that is worth exploring.”

According to Prause, there are two questionnaires to assess more qualitative aspects of the orgasm experience. “This could mean that there is some neural state that feels like a climax, but does not co-occur with pelvic contractions that we have not yet discovered. Alternatively, different experiences of orgasm may reflect the emotional context, such as feeling emotionally close to the partner or having taken a long time to experience climax during that sexual session.”

In other words, people often report changes in orgasm sensations based on the context around them — so while it hasn’t been tested in a lab, changing the context of the sexual experience could alter the veracity of one’s orgasm.

“My vote is on the latter,” Prause tells MEL. But, being a scientist, she advises caution before dripping hot wax on your chest while alternating between edging and meditating. “The brain experience may differ in some modest ways,” she theorizes. “The brain has to generate the orgasm, and that process in the brain must occur, but it is likely the subjective part of the orgasm would be influenced by other activity (e.g., emotional) in the brain.”

In other words: Physically, orgasms are the same. Emotionally, context can change what you “feel” during an orgasm, which might subtly tweak how you might experience climax.

Better Male Orgasms: Ejaculation vs. Orgasm

Carol Queen, an author and sexologist, champions the idea that “regular” people of any gender “can experience a stronger-than-usual (or stronger than they’ve had so far) orgasm.”

Queen says there are “various elements that can be involved and definitely some ‘orgasm hack’ techniques will put this experience a bit more in someone’s control.”

Steve McGough, an associate professor of clinical sexuality at the Institute for Advanced Study of Human Sexuality, admits that the “actual neuroscience is still in its infancy,” but “the current best understanding is that an orgasm tends to happen in three regions of our body… not just the contraction of the prostate.” An orgasm, McGough argues, can be “triggered in most men completely independent from the mental side.

“In fact, erection and ejaculation can be induced in men who are paralyzed and can’t feel their genitals,” McGough adds, pointing to a study in Denmark that studied disabled veterans who wanted to have children.

It’s worth keeping in mind that ejaculation and orgasm are two separate things. McGough is arguing that ejaculation is but the endpoint of what an orgasm can be. “ feels good and relieves sexual pressure,” but “it is just one very small aspect of what can be experienced.”

“Frequently guys don’t really think about having different types of orgasms, or they see orgasm and ejaculation as one experience,” McGough explains. “But is a wider range of experiences possible? Yes, if you take the time to explore things.”

Why Arousal Matters When It Comes to Masturbation and Sex

First, pay attention to your level of arousal. In short, the more aroused you are, the “stronger” your orgasm will feel. So if you’ve turned masturbating into a daily post-lunch routine in the office bathroom, now’s the time to stop that.

“If a person gets way more turned on than usual, the orgasm, if they have one, is going to benefit from that,” Queen tells MEL. “This example is not especially sexy, but think of the way a sneeze builds up. You can feel a sneeze coming on; sneeze right away and it’s not that explosive. But if you don’t sneeze immediately and the build-up to it continues, it can be a really big one. Orgasm is something like that, and arousal is the mental build-up and the physical status that makes sex play desired in the first place. And to get to high arousal … sometimes elements of extra kink or special circumstances — like trying to stay quiet while someone else is in the room, a new partner, etc. — are helpful.”

An easy way to achieve higher arousal is to simply hold off on orgasming. McGough compares it to drinking a glass of ice water when you’re thirsty. The thirstier you are, the better the water will taste.

“Orgasm and its related pleasure are similar,” he says. “If you are horny to the point it’s all you think about — and just trying to release sexual pressure as quickly as possible — orgasm and ejaculation is the route for this.”

However, if you really want to amp up the pleasure pressure and reach that mystical better male orgasm, McGough and Queen advise really drawing things out during the act itself.

Kegels, Edging and Long-Lasting Arousal for Better Orgasms

Queen refers to “long-lasting arousal,” which is “what the people who are into edging play with: They are building up arousal over periods of time, recognizing imminent ejaculation or orgasm, and backing off so that arousal can continue to build.”

She continues: “This charges up the body, basically. Like that sneeze, you are not immediately discharging the energy, but rather letting the arousal grow, and this will power the orgasm when it eventually happens.

“With high arousal and orgasm, our musculature is engaged, generally like when people arch their back, or clutch their sheets, or their toes curl,” she explains. “But trying not to do that probably allows us to take in the sensation and lets it last longer and go higher, so this strategy is in service to the higher and longer arousal tactics.”

Meanwhile, McGough hones in on the edging aspect. “When you can have continued sexual and sensual stimulation without quickly ejaculating, something almost magical can happen,” he explains.

A big part of edging is having strong kegel muscles, so you can properly attempt to “hold back” your orgasm. When you finally break, your strong-as-hell kegel muscles will make your orgasm feel stronger. Think Sammy Sosa blasting a home run after loading up on steroids for the first time. God, that must’ve felt amazing.

“The pulsing sensation that comes with orgasm and helps power ejaculation is due to the kegel (or pubococcygeal) muscles,” Queen says. “Strengthening these can make an orgasm feel more powerful.”

What About Sensate Focus and Mental Control?

Beyond strengthening the muscles themselves, McGough says, you’re also strengthening your “mental control over that area, benefit you in preventing ejaculation during sex or masturbation.” By focusing on your genitals and the pleasure therein, the thinking goes, your brain will “experience” a stronger orgasm.

And if you really want to put in the work, McGough recommends entering a near meditative state outlined by sexual health researchers William H. Masters and Virginia E. Johnson called “sensate focus.” While this was mainly to help women achieve orgasm, McGough says it also works on “helping guys take their experience to a new level.”

McGough continues to explain that one could even enter the mental state of “flow” during orgasm. And while “flow” is normally associated with world-class athletes and musicians, there’s no reason why you couldn’t enter this state of hyperfocus as you finesse your way through intrusive popup ads on YouPorn while straddling the bathtub ledge and aiming for the drain.

For Great Sex, Get to Know Your Erogenous Zones

To continue the body and mind themes inherent in arguments for a stronger orgasm, both Queen and McGough detail the necessity of a “blended orgasm.”

That is, “basically adding extra physical stimulation to the mix,” says Queen. “Not just stimulating one erogenous zone, but more than one. For our purposes, that could be penile stroking or oral as the basic stimulation, plus prostate stimulation, or plus nipple play, or plus kissing, or… so many options!”

According to Queen, this isn’t just for people who need an extra push toward climaxing. It “can help boost arousal even if a person has no issue with climax.”

Furthermore, Queen argues this isn’t just about piling on the stimulation, but rather a “more complex” way of stimulation. “Because different nerve pathways carry extra stimulation to the brain,” she says, different toys, porn, and context — like Prause mentioned earlier — can “add to arousal and hence to the power of the orgasm.”

However, Prause again urges caution, reminding us that an orgasm is a physical reflex. And because of this, she says, “it is unlikely that the orgasm ‘power’ or similar would be altered due to being initiated by new or multiple areas of sexual stimulation.”

So if the the orgasm itself will always remain the same, the least you can do is attempt to reach new heights in arousal before you bust.

Stimulating areas like the ears, nipples and neck “will have a powerful effect” in doing just that, McGough says, pointing to a study in The Journal of Sexual Medicine that found nipple stimulation enhanced the sexual arousal in 51.7 percent of the men tested.

So let’s say you’re able to hold off on orgasming for a few days. When you finally do, change it up: Tickle your neck and ears with a feather, enter a near-meditative state, and edge two or three times before your quick bedtime shower turns into a suspiciously lengthy one. You very well could be in for one hell of an orgasm.

Quinn Myers

Quinn Myers is a staff writer at MEL. According to his editor, you can find him “lurking in the darkest corners of the internet.”

Want More Intense Orgasms? Try This Simple, Subtle Exercise

In 1948, Los Angeles urologist Arnold Kegel, M.D. was treating women suffering from stress incontinence, embarrassing urine leakage triggered by coughs, sneezes, and laughter. He wondered if the cause might be weak urinary sphincter muscles unable to stay closed under the abdominal pressure caused by these actions. The urinary sphincter muscles are located between the legs, part of the pelvic floor muscle group that runs from the lower abdomen to the anus. Kegel theorized that exercises focused on strengthening the pelvic floor muscles might help women keep their sphincters closed and cure stress incontinence. He was right. His exercise program, Kegel exercises, improve bladder control and usually cure stress incontinence within a month or two.

Then something unexpected happened. Many women he treated confided that his exercises did more than simply cure their stress incontinence. They also seemed to produce more intense, more pleasurable orgasms.

On reflection, Kegel was not surprised. The pelvic floor muscles, notably the pubococcygeus (or PC), are the ones that contract during orgasm. As the pelvic floor muscles became stronger, it made biological sense that orgasms would, too—in men as well as women.

Kegel Exercises Work

Since Kegel developed his exercises, many studies have demonstrated their effectiveness—for both stress incontinence and better orgasms.

  • In a 2015 study, Turkish researchers taught Kegel exercises to 90 women with stress incontinence. “We find Kegel exercises effective,” they concluded.
  • In 2017, Iranian scientists worked with 145 menopausal women who complained of decreased sexual function and enjoyment. Some received standard medical care. Others attended a sex education class. And some attended the class and also practiced Kegels. After 12 weeks, the class/Kegel women reported the most erotic enhancement.

How To

To do Kegels, first identify your PC. It’s the muscle you contract to interrupt urinating, or to squeeze out the last few drops. Try stopping your stream a few times to identify your PC. PC contractions also cause a tightening of the anus.

Once you’ve identified your PC, sex therapists recommend doing both slow and quick Kegels. For slow ones, flex your PC and hold it contracted for a slow count of three, then relax. For quick Kegels, contract and relax your PC as rapidly as you can, then relax.

Begin by doing five slow contractions and five quick ones three times a day. Each week, increase the number of contractions by five—to 10, 15, etc.—until you’re up to 25 slow and fast contractions three times a day. Don’t increase contractions more quickly or you may suffer soreness between the legs.

Kegels can be practiced almost anywhere. No one but you knows you’re doing them. You might do Kegels while showering, driving, or watching TV. Typically, it takes a month or two of daily Kegels to notice enhanced orgasms.

Other Ways to Do Kegels

If you don’t benefit sufficiently from do-it-yourself Kegels, you might consider pelvic floor muscle-toning devices offered by many personal care catalogs variously called Kegel Exercisers, Kegelmasters, or other names that usually include “Kegel,” “pelvic,” or “PC.” Positioned between the legs, working these gadgets tones the muscles between the legs. Biofeedback offers another effective approach to improving pelvic floor muscle tone. But a 2017 analysis by Canadian researchers shows that home practice of plain old Kegels is usually the most cost-effective approach.

Older Men: The Kegel-Prostate Connection

Compared with young guys, older men report more sex problems, notably erection impairment. But men don’t need erections to have orgasms, and many older men report something they never expected—more intense, more earth-moving orgasms. The reason: they’ve been doing Kegels without realizing it.

Older men develop prostate enlargement, which makes urination more difficult. To empty their bladders, older men must squeeze their pelvic floor muscles, in other words, do Kegels. So it’s no surprise that many report better orgasms.

No matter if you’re a man or woman, young or old, try some Kegel contractions right now. Keep practicing and in a month or so, you should notice more pleasurable orgasms, both solo and with partners.

And if you’re already a Kegel exerciser, I’d be interested to hear how they’ve worked for you.

How to orgasm better?

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