- If Your Guy Does These 10 Things, He’s A Keeper
- 10 Signs He’s A Keeper
- 5 Signs That Prove He’s a Total Keeper
- He’s actually interested in hearing about your day (even the boring parts)
- His friends not only know who you are but know details
- He’s a willing mud mask participant
- He borderline overshares with you
- He goes out of his way for you
- 6 Signs he’s a keeper
- 15 He Remembers the Little Things
- 14 He Cooks You Food
- 13 Calling You Instead of Texting You
- 12 He Can Watch Netflix with You All Day
- 11 He Does Things You Like Even If He Doesn’t Enjoy It
- 10 He Invites You Almost Everywhere
- 9 He Talks A lot About His Life With You
- 8 He’s Affectionate
- 7 He Likes Giving You Advice
- 6 He Changes Plans For You
- 5 He Brings Out The Best In You
- 4 He Tells His Mom About You
- 3 You Can’t Stop Talking About Him
- 2 He Expresses Himself
- 1 He Communicates
- 20 Quick Exit: He’s Late
- 19 Quick Exit: You Picked The Place, And He Can’t Stop Criticizing
- 18 Quick Exit: You’re Having Your First Argument On Your First Date
- 17 Quick Exit: He Seems To Think He Knows You Already
- 16 Quick Exit: The First Thing He Wants To Do Is…Leave
- 15 Quick Exit: He’s Clearly Wearing What He Found On The Floor When He Woke Up
- 14 Quick Exit: He Can’t Get Off His Phone
- 13 Quick Exit: He Can’t Stop Talking About Himself
- 12 Quick Exit: He’s Mean To The Waitstaff/Taxi Driver
- 11 Quick Exit: He Talks About His Ex
- 10 Keeper: You Can Talk About Anything (Except Exes) – And You Do
- 9 Keeper: Body Language – He’s Turned Towards You
- 8 Keeper: You Laugh At The Same Jokes
- 7 Keeper: He Brushes Against You Accidentally, And You Both Smile A Little Nervously
- 6 Keeper: You Talked Him Into Trying Ethiopian Food For The First Time, And He’s Totally Up For It
- 5 Keeper: He’s Making As Much Of An Effort As You Are
- 4 Keeper: Time Flies By
- 3 Keeper: You Both Can’t Stop Smiling
- 2 Keeper: You Stare Into Each Other’s Eyes And It Feels So Natural
- 1 Keeper: At The End Of The Date, You Both Pause
- How To Tell If A Guy Is Worth It On The Very First Date
If Your Guy Does These 10 Things, He’s A Keeper
Despite the ridiculous amount of toxic dudes in the dating scene, there are some genuinely decent guys who are looking for the same things as you and who’ll treat you like the queen you are. Have you found one? If you relate to any of these things, the answer is a big fat YES.
Even when life gets crazy hectic, you always feel like his number one priority.
If he were to list all his priorities, where would you rank in the pecking order? If you think you’d come first (which is the only place you should be), he’s a keeper. Your guy should value your relationship above anything else. Yes, that includes football, soccer, and nights out with the bros. That’s not to say he can’t or shouldn’t have a life outside of your relationship but that you should feel loved and valued in the midst of it all.
He’s there for you even when you don’t realize you need him.
Is your guy there for your during a crisis even if things get a little messy or if the timing’s inconvenient? You know you’re with a good guy if he goes above and beyond to help you through a rough time. If you’re looking for a long-term partner, it’s essential for him to show you compassion, consideration, and empathy when you need it the most (and even when you don’t realize you need it).
He can’t imagine a future without you in it.
You know he’s not leading you down the garden path if he talks about you in his future. Does he ever mention you when he talks about his life goals? If he can’t imagine going through any stage of his life without you by his side, that shows he’s thinking long-term and means business about your relationship. Yup, he’s a keeper.
He wants to get to know the other people you know and love.
Your friends and family are important to you so they’re important to him too. If he’s invited to a family party or a friends birthday, he’s excited to go with you. He considers getting to know the people who’ve helped shape the woman he loves a privilege, and that’s a rare thing.
Your success brings him joy.
Some men are intimidated by successful women. Their egos are too fragile so they can’t hack it when their girlfriends are totally killin’ it in everything they do. This can lead to jealousy, bitterness, and filthy arguments. If your guy’s genuinely happy for and proud of you for smashing one goal after another and even brags about your accomplishment to others, he’s a keeper. Your guy should be your biggest cheerleader, after all.
He actually listens to you because he cares about your day to day life.
Does he not just hear what you have to say but actually absorb the information? If you have a big interview coming up or a daunting meeting ahead, does he remember? A simple text wishing you good luck or a call to ask how it went show he genuinely cares about you and your well-being. Sure, he might not always find these things super interesting, but they interest him because they have to do with you.
He helps you become the best possible version of yourself.
Your partner should make you feel like a million dollars—confident, fabulous, and beautiful. If you ever find your guy slowly chipping away at your self-confidence or putting you down, kick him to the curb. The right guy for you will make you feel like a superstar every single day.
He makes you smile even when you want to cry.
Can he make you feel better when you feel like poo? Whether he reminds you of an inside joke you share, surprises you with wine, or submits to binge-watching Gossip Girl, he always knows how to put a smile back on your face.
He has his life together and is truly ready for a mature relationship.
There’s no point wasting time trying to turn a boy into a man. If you want to make long-term plans with this guy, he should have his own apartment because he’s done with the bachelor lifestyle. He should be focused on his career and happy to start settling down. Make sure you’re both on the same page with this, otherwise it’ll only lead to upset.
He truly values your opinion.
Although he doesn’t always take your advice, he always asks for your opinion when it comes to major life choices. This is a sure sign he appreciates your input and takes you seriously. That’s the kind of guy you want to be with, right?
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10 Signs He’s A Keeper
Dating can often feel like a never-ending process of sorting through dodgy men. Yet, once in a while, someone worthwhile may come along and surprise you. But then you might find yourself asking, “Is this guy for real?”
Sadly, sometimes it isn’t real at all. He might just be trying to impress you during the newness of the honeymoon stage.
Although this is completely normal, you never want to cling onto the illusion of a lasting relationship with a guy who’s only invested in the moment. You want a man who’s fully committed to you in the present and the future as well.
If you’re wondering if your man is Romeo with relationship ADD or the real deal, there are some clear-cut signs to watch out for. Here are 10 signs he’s a keeper:
1. He remembers the details
A man who remembers all the little things you do and say is usually a keeper. It proves that he’s savoring all your wonderful thoughts, habits and other little tidbits. If he values these things, it’s likely that he genuinely cherishes you as a person. This is a keeper!
2. He wants to impress your family
A smart man knows that “making the cut” in your family’s eyes helps seal your relationship. For this reason, being accepted by them should be enormously important to him. If he can see a future with you, he will make every effort to win over your family with all the integrity and charm he can muster.
3. He can be real with you
Being real means he doesn’t need to pull out his bag of tricks and resort to games to attract you. An immature man may try to work his magic on you, while maintaining the upper hand by using a few classic tactics. For instance, he might wait a few days in between texts or worse, he might casually mention other women or ex-girlfriends in order to create tension and uncertainty on your part.
Although these are attempts to be mysterious and attractive, he’s not being genuine or taking any real risks to become closer to you. A man who is willing to make himself vulnerable and act honestly with you is the one who is a definite keeper!
4. He does the little things
As cliché as this saying goes, it always ring true! A boyfriend who cares will pay attention to all the little things that make you happy, and he’ll use them to bring you two closer. This could be as simple as bringing you a new phone case to replace your broken one or working to fix your slow computer. The important thing here is that love doesn’t always require over-the-top fairytale gestures because romance often comes down to the little things.
5. He’s not afraid to talk about the future
This is probably one of the biggest tell-tale signs of a keeper. If your man is antsy or vague when it comes to talking about the future, it’s because he’s not sure about the prospect. On the other hand, if he’s comfortable with this topic, it’s because he can genuinely picture this possibility and is taking it seriously. This type of man is the one you want!
6. He never forgets important events in your life
The one who remembers events like birthdays, interviews, anniversaries or any other important milestone is someone who cares about your life and personal growth. This type of guy is really rooting for your success and happiness— keeper!
7. He cares about your feelings
There are too many men out there who are either careless or pretend to care, but there are very few who actually care. Signs of caring will almost never come from words—that’s too easy. The real indication is if his actions suggest it. Actions always speak louder than words.
8. You make him want to become a better man
He might already be great, but if he loves you, he’ll want to be better. This is motivated by his impulse to be attractive to you and pave a promising path for a potential future. On an instinctual level, he’s protective of you and will work hard to make himself a more impressive mate to secure the relationship.
9. He’s a giver (in and out of the sac)
A man who enjoys making you smile will act as generously as he can to keep you happy. He understands that for a relationship to work, both parties need to be willing to give to one another. This standard extends to the bedroom just as much. For a real man, a woman’s pleasure is just as appealing as his own. As a giving lover, he will appreciate the fullness of a woman’s sexuality.
When you can fully enjoy yourself and completely let go, there’s a magnetic connection both mentally and physically. By creating these moments, he develops an intense chemical energy between you two that’s much hotter than just mere sex.
10. He makes you feel special
Never underestimate the importance of this one. When the RIGHT man recognizes how special you are, he’ll make sure to show you he feels this way. He may cook you dinner, sacrifice a guys’ night, or sing your praises to his friends. No matter how he chooses to express it, you’ll always feel incredibly awesome around him. Feeling good in your relationship is the easiest sign you’re with a keeper.
If your man shows all or most of these signs, you can be certain that you’re with a real keeper. And when you’ve got one, hold onto him and don’t throw him back into the sea!
5 Signs That Prove He’s a Total Keeper
I think that we can all agree that dating is hard and being in a relationship is harder. But making that crucial decision to go from “seeing other people” to “seeing each other” is nerve wracking.
I am a wildly sensitive person, so believe me I know the anxiety of consciously deciding to delete your dating apps in anticipation of things between you and Potential Mr. Perfect escalating to some serious exclusivity. That move of going all in on black puts you in a super vulnerable position because if things don’t work out, you’re inevitably going to feel crushed.
So when you’re sitting there with your finger hovering over the “delete profile button” and you’re thinking about if he’s worth cutting ties with all the cuties you’ve swiped right on, pull up this article and think back on your time together. If he’s not at least doing one or two things on this list. Then keep your options open for a little while longer, babe.
If not, maybe going all in isn’t such a risky bet after all.
He’s actually interested in hearing about your day (even the boring parts)
You know when you can tell when someone is zoning out? Their eyes glaze over, and they start monotonously nodding while checking their phone sometimes blatantly. And when you bring up something from an earlier conversation they have absolutely no idea what you’re talking about so you’re forced to catch them up Sparknotes style?
If he is almost never guilty of this (and shows genuine remorse if/when he forgets something important) then he’s a total keeper.
People, in general, have wildly short attention spans, and technology is only enabling them to shrink, so when anyone shows genuine interest in something you’re saying it seems like their one in a million. But when a cute guy who willingly wastes his life with you actually listens and can recall details than you really know you have their attention – and probably affection. If you find a boy who actually practices active listening, do not let him go.
If he not only cares what your passive aggressive co-worker did today but can recall their previous transgressions (and agree with you that they’re a total kiss ass) he’s definitely worth your time.
His friends not only know who you are but know details
Being introduced to his friends alone is a sign that he’s totally interested in you in the long run. Because why would he want to introduce some girl to his friends who are inevitably going to give him a hard time.
A sign that they’re really into you is if their friends not only know who you are, but know little details like where you work or how the two of you met in the first place. And if they know your name without you having to introduce yourself more than once (or at all) than you can be sure he’s a keeper.
Think about it, if his friends know who you are that means he’s talking about you. And if he’s talking about you that means he’s thinking about you. So you’re obviously on his mind as much as he is on yours.
He’s a willing mud mask participant
There is nothing more #CoupleGoals than those cute ass pics off couples in full face masks that habitually circulate the internet.
Firstly, that’s shit is good for your skin and you (as a woman wise to the secrets of skincare) are only trying to spread the wealth by going after him with a Biore strip. If he’s hesitant at first but changes his mind and is a repeat customer, then you know he’s a keeper.
This number on the list seems a little silly, but think about it… Guys are hypercritical of themselves – and their masculinity – especially when they’re trying to get with a girl. So if he is willing to slather on your Dead Sea Mud mask and look ridiculous in front of you, then he’s letting his guard down (plus looking at how gross your Biore strips get is both appealing and appalling to everyone).
Anytime when your man wants to make something a coupley activity, it’s a good sign that he’s a keeper. Everything from him spinning at the gym with you to insisting on grociery shopping as a pair, is usually a sign that he’s a good egg.
It’s one thing to talk about your passions and hobbies that you’re comfortable with. It’s another thing to get deep and talk about things that you’re not proud of or bittersweet or tough decisions.
If he opens up about his insecurities (and I don’t mean how he has one little bald patch between his mustache and beard. I mean REAL insecurities) then he’s a definite keeper. If he brings up things that are the furthest things from acceptable first date topics, then he’s showing that he’s invested (or doesn’t want to pay for therepy).
By him opening up about being fat in high school or about his fucked up family relationships or other insecurities or troubles, he’s showing that he’s not only comfortable around you, but he’s invested. He cares about what you think and trusts that you are not going to judge him for what he might share.
Sure, the’s conversations might be fueled by alcohol or a little marijuana, but that doesn’t mean he is any less invested in you and the progression of your relationship.
He goes out of his way for you
This is one of the biggest signs that he is in it to win it. If he is willing to go out of his way for you – in ways a little more taxing than opening the door for you – then he’s invested.
If he is willing to stay up late to see you (not just for sexy time, this applies to quality time) even though he’s going to be exhausted during his work day, he’s a keeper. If he is willing to drive out of his way to pick you up or help you out with something, he’s a keeper.
If he not only picks up the dinner tab, but is the type to surprise you with flowers or other trinkets because they made him think of you, he’s a keeper.
If he texts you or tags you in something on Facebook because it made him think of you, he’s a keeper. Girl, if he does anything because it made him think of you, he’s a gosh darn keeper.
If he is the type to go above and beyond your expectations, even in the little ways, then he’s a keeper.
Guys don’t just do things like slather foreign mud on their faces and overshare about their deepest insecurities for nothing. This means that they are invested in you and are hoping for some longevity as well. If your guy is doing things like this, then you can be sure you’re making a safe bet by deleting your dating apps and waving goodbye to all those guys out there.
And hey, if things don’t work out don’t feel like you were crazy in crushing and developing feelings. Because if he was doing one of these things, or doing all five, then he probably had feelings too; things didn’t work out for some other reason.
Is Mr. Maybe-Possibly-Potentially-Perfect the type to drive to your apartment even though you live on the other side of town, slap on a Biore strip, and talk about your day? Then you shouldn’t feel anxious when you take the mental step of going all in by putting an indefinite hold on all your online dating endeavors.
1. He wants you to befriend his friends. No, not like “Hey, we’ll be at this bar around 11 p.m. — you should stop by.” Instead, he talks about how he knows you’ll get along with his college best friend and picks a day for you all to go to dinner and get to know each other.
2. He remembers something you mentioned in passing. You once joked about how you can (and sometimes do) eat peanut butter out of the jar. So when the dessert menu comes, he zeroes in on the peanut butter sundae because he knows you’ll like it.
3. He sends you an article that made him think of you. The travel section of the paper had an article on Greece, and didn’t you just say you wanted to go there one day?
4. You actually want to tell your parents about him. You usually try to be careful about how much you reveal because you want to see how it goes first, but you feel too excited about this one to keep it to yourself.
5. His bookshelf has quite a bit of overlap with yours. And there are even a few books on there that you’ve been meaning to read for ages.
6. He’s genuinely interested in your job. Even if he does something completely different, he wants to understand exactly what you do, how you ended up there, and what you like about it.
7. You feel comfortable telling him about something that upset you. Maybe it’s dissatisfaction at work, maybe it’s an issue with a friend — you just feel like you can trust him, even after a short period of time.
8. He checks in on you. If you tell him you’re going to have a crazy week at work, he offers to get together over the weekend instead but texts you to see how everything’s going and if you need anything.
9. He calls you regularly. He loves your voice and doesn’t just want to communicate through text, IM, or email.
10. He tells you he can’t wait to see you. He texts you on Wednesday just to say he’s looking forward to your date on Friday. He uses an emoji, even though he doesn’t usually, because he knows it will make you smile.
11. You can’t stop telling your friends about how nice he is. You’ve been on so many crazy dates that you know how rare this can be.
12. Thinking about being alone with him gets you through a chaotic day. Sometimes your mind just drifts to him in the middle of a meeting, and you zone out until someone snaps you back to reality.
13. He makes sure to see you one or two nights every week. And you see each other at least on Friday or Saturday each week, so you can stay up late and sleep in together free of mid-week stress.
14. He researches new things to do in a city you’ve lived in for years. You love your go-to spots — and hope to establish regular ones with him — but it’s really sweet when he puts effort into finding somewhere you’ve never been.
15. He wants to do something special for your birthday. So what if it’s a random number like 27 or 32? He thinks you deserve a celebration.
20 Signs He’s in Love With You
18 Signs You’re With the Man You Should Marry
30 Signs You’ve Been in Your Relationship for a Ridiculously Long Time
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Photo credit: GalleryStock
Lori Fradkin executive editor Lori Fradkin is the executive editor of Cosmopolitan.com. Amy Odell editor Amy Odell is the editor of Cosmopolitan.com.
6 Signs he’s a keeper
6. He shows interest in your past life.
If a man truly likes and cares about you in a healthy, adult way, he will also be curious about your life before you met him. He won’t focus on past boyfriends – because that speaks to insecurity and jealousy – but he will show genuine interest in your old friends, silly childhood memories, and defining moments as you grew into an adult. A recent client, for example, shared that her boyfriend was never interested in looking at her old photos and didn’t seem to enjoy hearing stories about her from her old friends. With this guy, he was more interested in the attention being focused on him. A good guy, on the other hand, understands that getting to know your past is another part of falling in love with you today.
Though no man is perfect, the world is full of good guys who know how to treat a woman and how to consistently meet her emotional needs. If you encounter a guy who passes the test of this list, you have probably met someone who is a kind and sturdy person, one who just might make it to the next round as long as his good behavior continues!
By Dr. Seth Meyers
This article originally appeared on eharmony.
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It’s harder these days to find the perfect match. People can be so picky about who they want to pursue a relationship with and yet, they wonder why they stay single. But there are certain qualities that you can’t go wrong with, meaning, despite your other preferences, you should give them a chance if they possess these qualities.
Sometimes you don’t know what you have right in front of you. But we can all agree that when it comes to guys, they’re a little harder to distinguish from other guys. That’s because they generally tend to carry the same qualities. Plus, girls can be blind to tell if a guy wants her or not. It’s usually because they’re overanalyzing the situation too much and jump to conclusion when the answer is simple. So at the end of the day, girls just need to relax and stop thinking so much about the situation and see what’s in front of them. So how do you know which guy is a keeper?
We gathered the go-to signs that tell you he’s someone worth dating and giving a chance. A lot of these traits can be really hard to find in a guy so when you come across one who carries them, he’s a keeper in our book. Think of it as a rare occasion you must take advantage of.
The following will sure help you out find out if he’s a keeper or not. So check out the following 15 signs that show he’s a keeper.
15 He Remembers the Little Things
People tend to make birthdays and other big events a big deal. But in reality, it’s the little things that truly matter. When he remembers why you like that book author, why you prefer that clothing brand, why you like that movie, etc., he’s definitely a keeper because he remembers more than the trivial things. He cares about having in-depth conversations with you, not just small talk. It’s always nice to be caught off guard when he remembers something and brings it up. This tells you he is listening and puts you into consideration a lot. Having someone who doesn’t just think about themselves and their interests is a huge win nowadays. So for him to remember your interests means he’s really into you and wants to pursue something with you. This is a keeper in our books. Next time you meet someone who remembers the little things, know he’s really into you.
14 He Cooks You Food
In the beginning stages, if he makes you breakfast, lunch or dinner, then that just means he really likes you and wants to get to know you more. It’s just a nice gesture that shows you he wants you to stay and he enjoys doing things for you. It’s different when the two of you go out to eat and he pays. Anyone can just go out and eat and if he pays, great, but he’s probably just doing it because it’s the right thing to do. But when he takes the time to cook for you (unless cooking is a favorite hobby of his) then that’s a big sign he wants you. It doesn’t even have to be something extravagant. A nice egg sandwich for breakfast or pasta for dinner will do the job. Like said before, this usually occurs in the beginning so cooking might not be his thing so don’t take it personally when he stops making you breakfast.
13 Calling You Instead of Texting You
Let’s face it, girls are more glued to their phones than guys are. So when it comes to texting, it means a lot to girls than it means to guys. Guys are more old-school and prefer to talk to you on the phone than message you. But when he ends up calling you way more than texting, it means he really likes you. He can’t get enough of you so obviously he’s going to call you. If you start wondering why he barely texts you or responds to your texts, consider if he calls you often. If he does, then you have nothing to worry about. He just rather hear your voice than read words because it’s more personal. If you got a guy calling you, then know that means a lot and you can’t miss this sign. It’s a pretty obvious one.
12 He Can Watch Netflix with You All Day
Sure it’s nice to go out and do fun activities with your boyfriend or girlfriend. But sometimes, you just want to relax next to them and that’s not a bad thing. It doesn’t mean your relationship lacks creativity or life. If he’s usually preferring to watch movies with you and stay in, don’t take it as you’re boring to him or he doesn’t want to do anything with you. It probably means he’s comfortable with you and doesn’t feel the need to do “out there” things to keep things lively. Just being around you is enough. This is just one of those subtle hints that mean he really wants you and no one else. Guys are simple so when they feel like they can be simple with a girl, that’s a score in their book. Next time you feel you’re “boring” to him because you guys Netflix too much, remember he’s feeling good inside so there’s nothing to worry about.
11 He Does Things You Like Even If He Doesn’t Enjoy It
When you know he’s not into something you’re into, but he does it anyway with a good attitude, that’s a sign he totally wants you. There’s no way you can make a guy do something he doesn’t want to do so when he does it all on his own, it feels really good. He just wants to make you happy or he wants to get to know you more. He likes you so some of your hobbies are probably interesting to him which explains why he’s open to doing them, too, even though, it’s not something he would do on his own. Sometimes it’s just because he wants to spend time with you. Whatever will get him to be next to you, he’s up for it because he wants you. At the end of the day, it’s nice of him to show some interest in what you like while putting away his own interests to the side for the meantime.
10 He Invites You Almost Everywhere
If you notice he is always inviting you wherever he is going such as with friends for a night out, a family gathering, one on one to the gym, etc., he wants you. He likes your company, he enjoys being around you, you’re not annoying to hang out with and these are all good things. Inviting you everywhere doesn’t mean he’s just clingy, especially if you’re just starting to get to know each other. This just means he really wants to get to know you and so, how does he do that? Hang out with you as much as possible. Plus, he wants to see how you are and how it feels to be with you in different environments. It’s nice to know he wants you to be around him all the time. That means you’re doing something right. You don’t have to accept every invitation, though. But when you’re okay with going, go for it!
9 He Talks A lot About His Life With You
If he is open talking about his life with you, then for sure he wants you because it’s another sign that he is comfortable with you. He can talk all day with you about his job, family, friends, life events, etc. Not only because he is comfortable with you, but because he feels like you’re a good person to talk to and that’s why he wants you. Who wouldn’t want someone by their side who is easy to talk to? Plus, it’s nice to know that he enjoys doing other things with you than just flirt and be intimate. He sees you as not an intimate partner but also a friend which can be a good thing in the long run. He’s just trying to let you know you’re more than just a hook-up and wants to keep you around because you’re a positive influence in his life.
8 He’s Affectionate
This might sound like a no-brainer but it’s true. When he can’t keep his hands off your thighs, or his arms around you, he’s letting you know he wants you. Yes we know guys are affectionate creatures no matter what but there’s a difference between a guy being sensual and a guy who is just being affectionate with you. Sometimes they like to pull a string of your hair off your face because not only do they want to do you a favor but because it feels good to get close to you like that. So don’t take every affectionate move as “he just wants to hook up with me.” Believe it or not, some guys don’t just want to get intimate and have actual feelings. You don’t have to give him affection back if you don’t feel like it but at least recognize the sign as he is really feeling you.
7 He Likes Giving You Advice
Whether it’s what you should wear to your friend’s birthday party or what you should do to resolve the issue in your job, he likes helping you out. Even if it’s a small piece of advice, it counts. He also just wants to make sure you know he cares and he’s just not hanging out with you for hook-up purposes. If he does give advice often, though, then he’s probably a keeper as a boyfriend or a friend. He’s already helped build that foundation of friendship that is so important in a relationship so why not keep him as a good friend. Perhaps being with him in an intimate way is not the way to go now but somewhere down the line, you two could be a perfect match. So the next time you encounter a guy giving you advice, small or big, it probably means he’s into you or at least cares for you which isn’t a bad thing to have around.
6 He Changes Plans For You
If you want to hang out but he has plans already, he will try to make it work. It doesn’t matter how busy he is, he’ll try to squeeze you in his day or even replace his plans with you. He just likes your company, he feels the best when he’s with you and simply has a good time when he’s around you. He’s also not afraid to let you know you’re at the top of his list. This isn’t being clingy or obsessed. He’s just being real and direct with you as opposed to beating around the bush like most people do these days. It’s a sign for sure that he’s a keeper if he prioritizes you. We know how much it means to a girl to feel wanted and appreciated. But don’t take his availability for granted or else things could turn ugly real quick.
5 He Brings Out The Best In You
When you feel like you can be yourself and he just goes with it without making judgy eyes, he is a total keeper. He’s into you even at your worst moments such as when you’re sick, you kind of embarrassed yourself or your flaws come out. It’s a big sign when he accepts you for you and it almost feels too good to be true. But he’s a total keeper if he doesn’t make you feel bad for being you. He also tends to bring out the best in you and that’s because you feel good about yourself when you’re around him so it just causes you to be your best self. Can you say #winning? If he is bringing out this side of you that you like, why wouldn’t you keep him? Life is too short to live miserably in your own skin so take advantage when you come across someone who makes you feel good.
4 He Tells His Mom About You
If he tells his mom about you, then that definitely means something. No guy just tells his mom about a girl he is seeing and not think there’s something meaningful between the two of you. Of course, this could be a little overwhelming and that’s when women start overanalyzing, thinking he wants to settle down already and marry her the following year. We’re almost 100% sure, that is not the case. He just really likes you and wanted to share it with is mother. You’re more than just a fling because he wouldn’t tell his mom he is just hooking up with someone. So when a guy tells you he told his mom about you, you can for sure believe he wants you. Don’t overlook it or overthink. Just accept that he takes you more seriously than a friend with benefits. Sometimes girls don’t believe they deserve a good thing so they think he tells his mom about every girl but that’s so far from the truth.
3 You Can’t Stop Talking About Him
It’s already a clear sign that if he tells his parents or friends about you then he’s so into you. But if you happen to start talking about him with your friends and family, then this means a lot. The fact that you couldn’t keep it to yourself anymore means he’s more than just a fling or someone you’re talking to for entertainment purposes. His kindness, values, and the way he treats you all make a good reason for you to bring him up to your loved ones. Of course everyone wants you to be with a good guy so you think he’s the perfect guy to introduce to them. This is obviously a big step that many nowadays take for granted. By talking about him, it means he’s a part of your life now and that shouldn’t be something easy to accomplish for a guy.
2 He Expresses Himself
I mean could there be a more obvious sign he’s into you? We all know guys have a harder time to express themselves than girls do. So if he’s being open about his feelings to you, he is such a keeper. If he’s going out of his way just to send sweet messages and talk to you about the way you make him feel, then it seriously means something. You can’t take his openness for granted because like said before, guys don’t do that often. Believe it or not, guys are actually more sensitive than guys so if they get rejected for expressing themselves, they will shut down for a very long time and it will take a miracle to get them to open up again. We know how hard it is to get a guy to open up so don’t make the mistake of rejecting a guy who likes to share his feelings and thoughts with you.
1 He Communicates
When he lets you know what he’s up to or the plans he has with you later in the week, there’s no doubt he’s into you. It’s common to have the girl always check up on her boyfriend because he lacks communication. Guys don’t prioritize communication like girls do such as texting, calling, messaging, and yes verbally. It’s nice to have him give you the update on his life without you initiating the conversation. It totally means he is into you if he likes to let you know what is going on or if he asks you what is going on in your life.m Communication is key to being successful and it has to come from both parties. Plus, nothing makes a girl’s day than to be contacted by her man because it shows he’s attentive and considerate of her. Communication is probably the biggest turn on for a girl so for a guy to do it makes him a keeper.
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First dates can be a little nerve-wracking, that’s a given. Even when it involves two people who already know each other at least a bit, turning a meeting into an official date gives the whole occasion a different vibe. The elephant in the room is the big question: Will there be a second date?
With both parties trying to put their best proverbial foot forward, it can be hard to get a real feel for what is going on behind the smiles and small talk. He’s charming and seems okay, but is he really a nice guy? Beyond the basics, is he worth spending more time and effort on? Most importantly – is there genuine chemistry that’s worth exploring?
Even with those first date jitters, though, no one can truly hide who they are, and it will show up in their actions and words. From how he treats the waitress to how and what he talks about, there are many subtle and maybe not-so-subtle clues that can point out whether a second date is worth following up on, or whether it’s time to cut losses and figure out the nearest exit and the quickest way home. Here are some of the telltale signs to keep in mind.
20 Quick Exit: He’s Late
Forever Twenty Somethings
You’re just about to leave the coffee shop. He’s 20 minutes late, with no texts, no explanation. Just as you’re getting up from the table, though, he breezes in with a charming smile…but no explanation or apology. Are you over reacting if you feel put off by his behavior?
No, it’s not old fashioned to expect him to show up on time. It’s not a bourgeois affectation. It’s about having respect for your time. Anyone can be 10 minutes late, but if it’s longer than that, he should definitely call or text, and you should be happy with his explanation for leaving you waiting awkwardly by yourself. If he doesn’t value your time now, when do you expect him to start?
19 Quick Exit: You Picked The Place, And He Can’t Stop Criticizing
You thought it was a nice point in his favor when he agreed to meet at your fave club or restaurant. But, once he gets there, he can’t stop complaining about everything, from the dude at the door to the coat check fee, the menu, the music…and it just doesn’t stop. What gives? If he can’t loosen up and even try to have a good time, it’s a sign he’s self-centered and inflexible.
It’s also a sign of disrespecting your views – if the club or restaurant was your choice, clearly you think there are good things about it. This dude’s just too negative.
18 Quick Exit: You’re Having Your First Argument On Your First Date
When you’re meeting up for the first date, it’s understood that you probably don’t know each other very well, and that certain topics might come up that you disagree with – maybe even very strongly. That’s something we all have to be aware of these days.
The right thing to do if a hot button issue comes up and a heated disagreement is in the works is avoid the topic and then decide whether it’s a deal breaker or not. It’s better just to cut the date short if it is.
The wrong thing to do is get into an argument on your very first date – it’s a sign you two just aren’t right for each other. Why bother?
17 Quick Exit: He Seems To Think He Knows You Already
You go out for a bite to eat, and when you order a burger he says, “I’m surprised; I didn’t think you’d like something like that.” Or, you meet at a club and he says, “I figured you’d like this music,” but you don’t. It might leave you scratching your head, but don’t ignore it.
If he’s acting like he already knows you, it’s a sign that he’s not connecting with the real you. He’s already got you in the girlfriend box before you’ve even started. It’s also a sign that he’s not likely to listen to what you say, and certainly that he’s not interested in getting to know you, because he thinks he already does.
16 Quick Exit: The First Thing He Wants To Do Is…Leave
The two of you talked online before you met in person, and it seemed like you had a lot in common, like a shared love of electronic dance music. You agreed to meet up at a dance club he suggested.
Now, you’re barely halfway through your very first drink and you’ve barely hit the dance floor, when he seems to think the pair of you are just about ready to hit the road…for his place.
Wait, what? What was all that talk about dancing?? It wasn’t supposed to be that kind of date! He’s obviously not interested at all in getting to know you as a person. Next!
15 Quick Exit: He’s Clearly Wearing What He Found On The Floor When He Woke Up
Sure, it’s just a casual date for coffee, but his jeans and t-shirt are wrinkled, and they don’t look particularly clean. His hair might be sporting that unstyled/styled look, but you have strong doubts. In fact, it looks like he pretty much crawled out of bed and fished around for whatever clothes were lying on the floor.
Now, it’s not that you’re expecting a tie and tux – not unless your first date is the opera, that is – but the fact that he’s clearly made no effort at all tells you a lot about what you can expect if you decide to continue.
14 Quick Exit: He Can’t Get Off His Phone
This one should go without saying. Sure, some people have very important jobs and need to be on call to a certain degree, but let’s face it, those people aren’t most of us. Even if he is, and you’re satisfied that it’s a legit concern – like he’s the only qualified open heart surgeon within 10 miles and the call is an emergency – any phone time should be limited.
If he can’t keep his attention on you during your first date, then what can you possibly hope for later on? Ditto if he can’t keep his eyes off the big TV screen in the club.
13 Quick Exit: He Can’t Stop Talking About Himself
You had some easy topics of conversation to bring up in case there was a lull in the conversation. But, you don’t need them because he just won’t stop talking – and it’s all about himself. You’ve been regaled with a string of non-stop details about his life, his accomplishments, his job, his family, and on and on.
This dude is clearly not interested in you and your life, and somehow assumes you will be fascinated by his. You’ll always take second place with this guy – best to cut this date short.
12 Quick Exit: He’s Mean To The Waitstaff/Taxi Driver
He seems to be taking great pleasure in harassing the waitress with trivial extra requests, and then laughs about her behind her back as she tries to accommodate him. That’s after he made fun of the taxi driver’s accent on the way over to the restaurant from the show – loud enough for the driver to hear it.
How people treat someone when they think they can get away with it is very revealing. Someone who is rude, inconsiderate or otherwise mean to people who bring them their food and drinks, or drive them to the date location, are showing you that they think they are superior. It’s not such a great sign of a future mutually fulfilling relationship, and besides, what if he decides one day that he can treat you like that too?
11 Quick Exit: He Talks About His Ex
You walk by an apartment building and he notes, “That’s where my ex lives.” Then, in the restaurant, you order a salad, and he mentions, “My ex used to eat nothing but kale salad.” Really?
You don’t want to get possessive on the first date, but there’s really no excuse for it. Other than a possible brief mention along the lines of, “I broke up with my last girlfriend six months ago,” his ex-girlfriends should not be the topic of discussion at all. Neither should your ex, for that matter. If either of you feels the need to talk about previous relationships and loves on your very first date, and they’re constantly on your mind, maybe you shouldn’t be dating at all just yet.
10 Keeper: You Can Talk About Anything (Except Exes) – And You Do
You’re normally a little cautious – as you should be – on a first date, but somehow you ended up telling this dude your whole life story. The hours flew by and it didn’t matter if you met for coffee or a walk in the park or a fancy dinner, you two started talking and didn’t stop until several hours later!
This is a great sign. Being able to keep each other entertained with conversation signals a good connection between you. It’s also a good omen that a second date could very well be on the cards.
9 Keeper: Body Language – He’s Turned Towards You
Body language is important on your first date. You want to know that he’s really into you, and that his interest is genuine and not faked. His body language can tell you much more than his words.
Let’s say you meet at a coffee shop or restaurant. Is he sitting with his body and head turned towards you? Or, is he sitting with his body turned away from you, checking out who else is coming through the door, and only turning his head towards you when he speaks to you? We all naturally turn our body towards what our mind is focused on. If he’s always turning and looking away from you, it’s a strong sign that his mind is elsewhere. If, on the other hand, he leans in, or starts to mimic your own body language, it’s an excellent indication that you’re on the same wavelength, and making a real connection.
8 Keeper: You Laugh At The Same Jokes
It’s been just one of those nights. You’re not sure when it started, but he said something about the waiter’s fake French accent, it got you giggling and the two of you haven’t stopped laughing since. In fact, the people at the next table have looked over at you with annoyed expressions more than once because the laughter just goes on and on.
Having the same sense of humor is a great sign that you two are compatible, and worth at least that second date. If you can laugh together, what else will come so easily?
7 Keeper: He Brushes Against You Accidentally, And You Both Smile A Little Nervously
This is a sign of good chemistry. Let’s say you’ve only just met and he bumps into you while you’re walking through the door of the coffee shop. Do you stumble and both mutter “Sorry!” feeling embarrassed and awkward about it? Does he make a joke about your clumsiness, and make it sound like it was all your fault? Worse yet, does he become annoyed and say something really sarcastic?
It’s such a minor event, it shouldn’t annoy anyone, or be a question of whose fault it was. On the other hand, if you both smile or laugh at what happened, it means you are already at ease with each other – and if you feel a few nervous butterflies, it is definitely on!
6 Keeper: You Talked Him Into Trying Ethiopian Food For The First Time, And He’s Totally Up For It
You like trying new and out of the ordinary things. So, you suggested that new Ethiopian restaurant down the street, and there you are. He clearly does not have a clue what he’s ordering, but he’s laughing about it, letting you make suggestions and generally having fun with the situation.
Being willing to take a chance on something new for your first date – whether that’s something on a restaurant menu, or your slightly eccentric hobby – is a great sign that he’s willing to compromise and make decisions with you, not for you.
5 Keeper: He’s Making As Much Of An Effort As You Are
You took a lot of care in choosing just the right outfit to wear – casual, but classic – and you can see that he did the same. He initiates topics of conversation as much as you do, and he’s pitching in ideas, whether it’s where to go next, where to sit and so on. In other words, he’s making as much of an effort as you are.
If his answer to everything is “I don’t care, you decide,” it’s a sign of disengagement. When he’s making an effort, you can relax and have fun.
4 Keeper: Time Flies By
OMG is it morning already?? It seems like he only just picked you up an hour ago, but suddenly the whole evening has passed by. From the coffee shop to a movie, to a long walk in the park, it’s not one single moment you remember out of the rest so much as a happy and relaxed flow of the whole date. All you really do remember is smiling, and that cute look he gets in his eyes when he laughs. Swoon!
When you don’t notice the time passing by, it’s a terrific sign that the two of you have a real connection.
3 Keeper: You Both Can’t Stop Smiling
You’re starting to feel a little silly, but you can’t help but notice that he has a smile plastered on his face too. By the middle of the date, you find yourself just smiling for no reason you can think of, and as you watch his face – because you are watching his face – you can see that same kind of smile dancing on his lips just out of the blue, while he’s staring out into space.
There’s an obviously positive vibe you are both responding to. Just run with it!
2 Keeper: You Stare Into Each Other’s Eyes And It Feels So Natural
If you catch each other looking straight into each other’s eyes, and your immediate response is to pretend that something over his left shoulder is suddenly very interesting, you should ask yourself why. Why are you avoiding his gaze? Eye contact is a good way to gauge how that first date is progressing. A little awkwardness is natural at first, but if it goes on for too long, then there’s probably a deeper problem at work.
If, on the other hand, you find yourself looking directly into each other’s eyes as you talk – and even when you aren’t talking – without any awkward moments, it’s a sure sign that the two of you are comfortable with each other, and things are going better than well.
1 Keeper: At The End Of The Date, You Both Pause
He went all gentleman on you and walked you to your front door. Although you know you both have an early morning the next day, as you pulled your key out of your handbag, you looked at him and saw he was looking at you. You both hesitated.
There’s that magic moment where you could be polite and end your date with a smile, or make plans for when you’ll get together on the weekend. That mutual eye contact and hesitation before you say anything are unspoken signs that you both don’t want the date to end!
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Struggling to find the perfect guy? We feel your pain. You don’t want to waste precious time that could be spent with your Prince Charming on the wrong guy! With the hook-up culture that has come to define romance these days, we know it can be tough to find Mr. Right. But it’s not time to give up hope yet! There is a Ryan Gosling out there for each and every one of us… you just need to find him. With these tips, you’ll be able to tell if he’s the one by the end of your first date.
1. He wants to know you better
Hanging out with a new guy is exciting! We’re all familiar with the thrill you get when he texts you and the inevitable butterflies when he asks you out for the first time. However, this excitement should be reciprocated.
Rachel Born, a Ph.D. candidate in human sexuality at Widener University, believes that showing you care goes both ways. “Infatuation, that feeling of wanting to be with the other person, happens to both women and men when they fall in love,” she says. “If he’s lukewarm about hanging out with you, take it as a sign.”
If you spot him scrolling through his Instagram feed during the date, he’s definitely not worth it. Maintaining eye contact and keeping his phone in his pocket are sure signs he’s a keeper.
While love may not be on the table on the first date, if he makes an effort to participate in the conversation and listens to what you have to say, he’s probably interested. Lucy, a collegiette at the University of Windsor, met her boyfriend in a high school class and knew he was a keeper because he was so engaged in their conversation.
“He was actively listening to what I was saying,” she says. “He made sure that he was contributing interesting responses to our conversation rather than just a ‘yeah’ or a ‘sure,’ and he was making tons of eye contact.”
Now Lucy says he’s not only her boyfriend, but her best friend! If he’s putting in the extra effort and showing you that he cares, he might just be the one.
2. He’s consistent
You want to be with someone you can trust. Dr. Seth Meyers, licensed clinical psychologist and author of Dr. Seth’s Love Prescription, says that a good way to get a sense of a guy’s honesty from the start is if he calls when he says he will. If you’re talking to a guy at a party and he leaves to chat with friends, claiming he’s coming back later to finish the conversation, make sure he keeps his word! When he says he’s going to do something, it should happen. The same applies to your first few dates. If he comes half an hour late to pick you up and gives questionable excuses, take it as a warning.
Although they might seem like small details, if he’s honest with you about the little things, he’s much more likely to confide in you about the important stuff down the line. “A consistency between words and actions is one of the most telling signs that a guy is a keeper,” says matchmaker Jasbina Ahluwalia.
If you can’t be sure that what he’s telling you is true, there’s no way you’ll be able to feel comfortable with him, making it impossible for the relationship to go anywhere.
3. Your friends are his friends, too
The Spice Girls had it right the first time! If you want to be our lovers, you’ve definitely got to get with our friends. Making an effort with you isn’t the only thing he should be doing. While it’s always flattering to have a guy come up to you at a party, if you’re standing with your friends and he ignores them, that’s a bad sign. Just think about it—you would never want to get caught third-wheeling a conversation, so your friends shouldn’t have to, either! When you introduce him to your friends, he should respond accordingly and engage with them as well.
A genuinely nice guy will make conversation with your friends even if you’re the one he’s interested in. Dr. Meyers agrees and says if a guy goes out of his way to be nice and make an effort with your friends when you’re all together, he’s one of the good ones. Actions speak louder than words, and him actively trying to get to know your friends says it all! If he’s working towards befriending your pals, he’s definitely a keeper.
4. He’s respectful
While you shouldn’t necessarily expect your guy to be interested in Pumpkin Spice Lattes or the latest fall nail polish color, he should always respect the things that matter to you. You don’t want a guy who agrees with everything you say just to make you happy, but it’s essential that even when he’s being honest, it comes across in a respectful manner.
He should be supportive, not sardonic! Your thoughts and ideas are important and should be treated as such. “If he can celebrate your you-ness, then yes, he’s a keeper!” Born says.
This quality can be easy to spot right off the bat by watching how he interacts with others. For example, if you’re on a first date and he is dismissive or rude to the waiters, watch out! The way he acts towards them can be very telling of his personality. If he’s always conscious of the way he speaks to others and makes sure to utilize the proper etiquette when he’s out, that’s a good sign. His attitude towards others is a reflection of how he will act towards you.
5. You’re on the same page
While it may be hard to tell if your core values align the first time you talk to him, the first date presents many opportunities to see where he stands. For example, if he spends a significant portion of the date talking about his parents or his siblings, you’ll be able to immediately tell he’s family oriented. While the conversation may begin a bit more surface level, you’re bound to discover some new, more important things about him as the date goes on.
Being different than your guy is okay – opposites do attract sometimes! However, you want to make sure that you’re on the same page where it really counts. If your core values are completely different, Ahluwalia says there may be a problem. For example, she says that “if you place a high-level of importance on healthy eating and fitness, and he regularly disparages people who ‘waste’ money on produce or ‘waste’ time on physical activity,” that disconnect may make getting closer quite difficult. Make sure to remain attentive, because the next thing he says may very well make or break your connection with him!
If you can check all of these things off your list, he might be the one! If not, keep searching. We know Mr. Right is out there somewhere!
How To Tell If A Guy Is Worth It On The Very First Date
A first date isn’t always enough to tell if a guy will actually be worth your time and effort, but it usually is. If you’re wondering how to determine if this man deserves a second date or not, ask yourself if he’s doing these things that prove he’s earned himself a second date with you:
He plans a real date, not a casual hangout.
If a guy tries to hang out for the first time by just chillin’ at his place, that’s not a good sign. If you’re looking for a real relationship, you want a guy who plans something romantic where you can really get to know each other. Whether that’s dinner, a movie, or something active like hiking, he should put some thought into it.
He makes an effort on his appearance.
If a guy put time into making himself look nice for you, that’s a huge plus. You don’t want a guy who show up in sweats and messy hair. Wearing something decent and showing up well-groomed shows that he thinks your worth his time and he wants to impress you. It also lets you know what to expect during a relationship — if he stops making an effort, something might be wrong.
He behaves like a gentleman.
Chivalry isn’t dead, or at least it shouldn’t be. There are guys out there who still behave like gentlemen! If a guy picks you up, opens the door for you, and treats you with basic decency, he’s a keeper. You should also pay attention to his table manners because no one wants a slob.
He’s genuinely happy to be there.
If he seems anxious, keeps checking his watch, and doesn’t seem interested in answering your questions, he sees you as an inconvenience. He should be there in the moment with you with a smile on his face and paying attention to you during the date. If he’s not, make sure this is both your first and last date.
He’s paying attention to you.
It says a lot when a guy’s eyes don’t glaze over as you’re telling him about yourself. A man who’s really worth your time won’t just half-heartedly listen to you; he’ll remember what you say and stay involved in the conversation. If he’s not, it’s not going to get any better during the second date.
He treats others with respect.
If you’re out at a restaurant or doing something that involves interacting with other people, pay attention to how he’s treating them. If he’s being rude, stingy, or making fun of them, he’s not the type of guy you want to have a relationship with. If he will treat those people like that, who’s to say he won’t end up treating you, your friends, or your family that way as well?
He speaks fondly of his friends and family.
You can tell a lot about someone by how they talk about the people they’re closest to. If he’s saying nice things about the people he’s holds dear, that’s great. If he’s bad-mouthing them, that’s a clear sign that this guy is not worth your time. Dating someone with negative energy like that isn’t a good idea.
He doesn’t bring up other women (unless you ask).
If a guy is constantly talking about other women and his exes, he’s a player and proud of it. Not to mention he’s also extremely disrespectful. He should never bring up other women unless you ask him about it. Instead, he should keep the conversations focused on you and him.
He wants to get to know you.
Is he just going on and on about himself, or is he asking you questions and getting to know you? A guy who’s serious about dating you will make sure he’s engaged in conversation and getting to know you the best he can. He’ll push passed the basics and dig deep to learn about who you are.
He doesn’t try to take you home.
This is a great indicator that he’s not just looking for a one-night stand. A goodnight kiss is okay if the date goes well, but a truly decent man will be willing to wait on the other stuff because he actually likes and respects you. A guy who’s not just looking for a hookup is worth getting to know.
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